Chapter 49: Wife
“Senior, did I complete the task?”
The next afternoon, the 18-year-old disconnected old man looked at the 226,000 fans at the bottom of his homepage and asked Lin Qizheng cautiously.
Bang bang. Lin Qizheng pounded the table, covering his face and crying bitterly. “Why can someone take a random, dirt-simple peace sign photo and go viral across the net? 220,000 fans! That’s so many times mine; where is my dignity?”
The crying in Room 100 was deafening. Zhang Lin sighed and patted Lin Qizheng’s shoulder. “Wait until you look like the Youngest one day. Forget 220,000; you’ll hit 2.2 billion straight away.”
Lin Qizheng pointed at Wen Rong, crying even louder. “Is this a look I can grow into? How many people in the world can look like that?”
Opposite them, Wen Rong nodded sincerely. “Senior, I admit I am really very beautiful.”
Slap. Heavily traumatized, Lin Qizheng slammed the table and stood up. “You—”
Zhang Lin yanked him back. “Don’t be angry, don’t be angry. Do you remember the President made him admit he looks beautiful? If you want to blame someone, blame the President.”
“…”
Lin Qizheng remembered. For the sake of club harmony, Wen Rong also forcibly made him admit he had talent.
The gun fired by Zhang Jincheng hit Lin Qizheng right between the eyebrows for the third time.
His heart was broken.
Lin Qizheng clutched his aching and sour chest and sat back down. “Okay, the first task… count it as your extraordinary talent completing it easily. Next, we start the second task. This is an arduous task. Don’t get arrogant; give me twelve points of spirit.”
Wen Rong, like a devout believer, held up his phone solemnly. “Senior, please speak.”
“You scroll through Blue Book for two hours every day.”
“Two hours?”
Wen Rong looked at his homepage in distress, not understanding why he had to watch for two hours.
Thinking of his study plan, he tentatively asked, “Is 10 minutes okay? I have other things to do.”
“What else do you have to do at night?”
Wen Rong took out his planner and showed it to Lin Qizheng. “My grades aren’t good, so I have some study tasks.”
Lin Qizheng looked down and saw the jam-packed schedule. The previous page had over a dozen items from top to bottom, all checked off beside them. They must have been completed.
He immediately thought, I’m really not human, delaying the Youngest’s studies.
Just then, Zhang Lin suddenly kicked his chair away and stood up, his face serious. “Qizheng, come here for a sec.”
“What’s wrong… Hey, why are you dragging me?”
Lin Qizheng was inexplicably dragged out of Room 100 by Zhang Lin. Wen Rong didn’t know what was going on, following behind holding his phone with both hands.
Zhang Lin looked back. “Youngest, sit over there and wait. I have a few words to say to him.”
With that, he closed the door.
Lin Qizheng stared at the door panel strangely. “What are you doing? Why avoid the Youngest?”
Zhang Lin held up his phone and pointed at the news on it for Lin Qizheng to see. “I’m doomed. I scolded the Youngest that day, saying he had no parents to teach him.”
“He didn’t mind, right? He hasn’t mentioned it… Holy crap!” Lin Qizheng read the words on the news clearly, shocked. “The Youngest doesn’t actually have a secret crush on you, right? He didn’t beat you up on the spot that day.”
The news was published a few months ago. It was about Wen Rong saving Shi Jing and his mother, but what shocked the two of them were the words “Welfare Institute.”
This meant Wen Rong had no parents.
—Didn’t your parents teach you?
Zhang Lin remembered what he had said, and a chill ran through him. Especially when he thought about how Wen Rong didn’t argue and even took the initiative to apologize, he wished he could go back and slap himself to death.
Zhang Lin fretted, “Why didn’t he say he didn’t have parents?”
“Is that something easy to say out loud?” Lin Qizheng paused. “This incident made quite a stir back then. You actually didn’t read the news.”
“You didn’t read it either.”
“…”
After a long silence, Lin Qizheng asked, “So what do we do? He didn’t say anything. I don’t know if he took it to heart.”
Zhang Lin rubbed his forehead. “I don’t know what to do either. Why is his temper so good? He should have told me to shut up back then.”
“He shouldn’t have just told you to shut up; he should have beaten you up.”
“…”
The wind blew bleakly. Lin Qizheng shivered, saying hopefully, “Since he didn’t mention it, how about pretending it never happened?”
“How can we pretend it never happened?”
“Then what do you propose?”
“…”
During the silence, a knock knock knock sounded on the door. Wen Rong asked softly from inside, “Seniors, are you done?”
Lin Qizheng rolled his eyes. “I think we can really pretend we don’t know. We just taught him not to be so literal; why are we getting literal ourselves?”
“It’s not the same thing. That was just a disagreement, but this is…”
“It’s obvious right now that the Youngest isn’t angry about this. How about this: say you want to treat everyone to a day out for your birthday this weekend, and let the Youngest plan the itinerary. He should choose things he likes. If he has a happy day playing, we can consider this matter closed.”
“…”
“Don’t overthink it. Words have been spoken; can you take them back?”
Zhang Lin frowned. “Is he a little too easy to bully?”
“Yeah… yeah.”
“Let’s change this personality of his. Consider it atonement.”
The two looked at each other, reached an agreement, and opened the door to return to Room 100.
Wen Rong was looking at his phone. On the screen, 226,000 had risen to 259,000. Lin Qizheng’s eye twitched; he was jealous and wanted to cry. Enduring the heartache, he sat down. “Youngest, considering you have a study plan and can’t scroll Blue Book for two hours, the plan has changed. The second task is changed to scolding 10 people on Blue Book every day.”
Wen Rong was shocked: “Huh?”
“Huh what? Learn how to scold people for me. Being this honest, you’ll be bullied to death when you work.”
Honest Person Wen Rong nodded hurriedly. “Okay, okay, Senior. Do I choose these 10 people myself?”
“Yeah, choose the ones posting bad comments. If the battle lasts until the second day, the second day counts as one person too. If it lasts until the tenth day…”
“Mhm, mhm.”
“If it lasts until the 10th day, it means you’re no match for them. Hand it over to me then; I’ll help you scold them.”
“…” Wen Rong was silent for a moment, then nodded obediently.
He was a man of strong action. Saying he would do it, he planned to find someone with bad comments to scold. Zhang Lin suddenly reached out and blocked his phone screen. “Wait—Qizheng, find him a side account. His main account is real-name right now.”
“Oh, right.” Lin Qizheng corrected himself. “I’ll find you a side account. You have to log into the side account to scold people, understand?”
“Mhm, mhm.”
Lin Qizheng and Zhang Lin breathed a long sigh of relief, like old fathers finally watching their child grow up.
Wen Rong, unaware he had just become a son, took the words to heart. Returning to his homepage, he couldn’t help but say, “Seniors, there’s something I want to ask you about.”
“Shoot.”
Wen Rong’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he organized his language to ask curiously, “Seniors, why do even girls call me ‘Wife’? And ‘Sister’. And… and calling me ‘Son’.”
Sitting there with nothing to do just now, Wen Rong briefly scrolled through Blue Book and saw many strange replies in his photo’s comment section.
[With looks like this, and studying at Floriman Academy, are you letting others live?]
[Found him, God. This is the boy who saved Zhang Wanfei and Shi Jing a few months ago.]
[Why does he look different from the news?]
[It’s normal. Who doesn’t suddenly become beautiful after going from high school to university? Besides, Floriman Academy’s uniform is so nice; even a dog could wear it with style.]
The initial comments were quite normal, but later the style gradually became weird.
[OMG, first time seeing such a pure, non-greasy, and kind man. I love him so much! Wife Wife Wife Wife Wife]
[Straight male for twenty years, now I’m a mosquito coil (bent).]
[Hi, Wife, are you a student at Floriman Academy?]
[Such a pretty sister. Sister must share more daily life, okay?]
[Baby, tell Mom what you like. Mom will go out and buy it for you right now.]
Wen Rong’s fingernail tapped the screen, opening the commenter’s homepage. They had shared junior high school exercise books a few days ago.
For the first time, he felt like laughing and crying. “Senior look, this person is clearly only 12 years old. Why does she call me Baby? And claims to be my Mom?”
“…”
“…”
In the silence, the two suddenly realized this was history repeating itself. They quickly said, “Youngest, calm down. You can’t make Blue Book enforce real names too.”
“I—”
Lin Qizheng interrupted him: “Youngest, getting you online is to let you have more contact with young people nowadays. I don’t mean to oppose your making the Black Pigeon forum real-name; you did the right thing then. It’s just… we want you to scroll Blue Book now to desensitize you. Get used to being called ‘Wife’. Those people have no malicious intent; it’s different from the forum.”
“Isn’t ‘Wife’ something you have only when you start a family?”
“Because many people don’t get married nowadays, and they are relatively open. Just treat it as a form of address similar to ‘good bro’. Everyone likes you, so they just run their mouths calling you ‘Wife’ to express… affection. Young people shout like that among themselves. Sometimes I call Zhang Lin ‘Wife’ too. Right, Wife?”
Zhang Lin endured the nausea and nodded. “Right. This actually means liking you as a person. It doesn’t necessarily mean they want to date you; they just purely like you very much. Like liking a celebrity. Didn’t Shi Ye win the championship? Look at the comments under his post; many people call him ‘Husband’.”
Wen Rong tilted his head. “So strange.”
Lin Qizheng’s throat tightened. “What?”
“Why call him Husband, but call me Wife?”
“…”
“…”
Zhang Lin rubbed his forehead. “Maybe Shi Ye is too rough. You are sweet and soft like a pretty little girl, so they call you Wife.”
Then he explained anxiously, “Being like a little girl is a compliment. do you think girls are pretty? Look at me when I cross-dress; isn’t it more eye-catching than Shi Ye?”
Although this “young people’s way of communication” was a bit incomprehensible to Wen Rong, he followed the seniors’ train of thought. Everyone shouted it, which meant everyone thought it wasn’t wrong. Furthermore, Senior Zhang Lin’s cross-dressing was beautiful, and the pretty girls at the girls’ school, like Evelyn and Jiang Zhiyue, were all very beautiful. The point that “Wife” had more complimentary meaning than “Husband” was also correct.
Wen Rong pointed at the comment section and continued, “So Seniors want me to learn from them? Calling people I like ‘Wife’?”
Lin Qizheng nodded. “Mhm, mhm.”
“I will try my best to learn.”
Wen Rong still couldn’t accept becoming a “Wife,” guessing he just wasn’t used to it yet. He opened his homepage intending to “desensitize” himself when he discovered Senior Leon had sent a message a few minutes ago.
Leon: [Stayed at the Administration Building busy with club matters after class today. Just stood by the window and realized I can see the entrance of your Room 100 from here.]
“Senior, I’m going out to reply to a message.”
Wen Rong got up and walked to the door, looking toward Room 101. Sure enough, he could see the window next to Room 101.
Unfortunately, the sky was still slightly bright, and the window reflected light, so he couldn’t see Senior Leon inside.
Leon: [Why did you come out?]
Wen Rong walked two steps in that direction but still couldn’t see him, so he gave up.
[I thought I could see Senior from here too.]
Leon: [If you want to see Senior, you can start a video call.]
[Forget it, I still have to use my phone to look at Blue Book.]
There was no instant reply from the other side. After a while, he said: [You opened a Blue Book account?]
[Mhm, mhm. Seniors wanted me to learn the communication methods between young people.]
Leon: [What are the communication methods between young people?]
Calling others Wife.
Wen Rong suddenly had a thought: I can’t be the only unlucky one being called someone’s wife.
[Does Senior want to learn?]
Leon: [Hearing you say that, Senior is suddenly a little interested.]
[You can’t get angry if you learn it.]
[Why would I get angry?]
[Senior, do you really want to learn?]
Leon: [Mhm.]
[The communication method between young people is calling each other Wife.]
Extremely light pupils rotated in their sockets. Biting his lip with his pearly white teeth, Wen Rong mischievously typed: [Senior, can I call you Wife in the future?]
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