Chapter 33: The Truth of the Past
“Sorry, sorry.”
Chu Lianmo quickly released Qi Xiaojun, “Did I hurt you?”
Qi Xiaojun laughed, “I’m Qi’s war god. Am I that delicate?”
“…Yes, yes…” Chu Lianmo was so happy he felt awkward, unsure of what to say or do.
“Lianmo, you…” Qi Xiaojun looked at Chu Lianmo for a moment, a little embarrassed, his cheeks flushed slightly as he asked a question that had been lingering in his mind, “When did you start liking me?”
“Heh.” Chu Lianmo smiled gently, sitting back down beside Qi Xiaojun, pulling him to lean on his shoulder, “Ajun, let me tell you slowly.”
“At first, I only felt sympathy for your situation, so I wanted to take care of you. Of course, I also had a good impression of you because you’re handsome.”
“…” Qi Xiaojun found this both funny and touching. It was the honest truth; upon their first encounter, the only thing they could assess was appearance.
“Later, we became friends, reciting poetry, drinking tea, discussing the world, and our ideals. I realized that we have much in common, a kindred spirit.
“Gradually, I developed other feelings for you. Chu Wei De had already married and had children. Father first urged Chu Ziqian, and then me…but I found myself uninterested in the noble ladies he arranged.
“I finally realized I had fallen for you. Do you remember how I tested your feelings when I was seventeen?”
Qi Xiaojun paused, trying to recall, but his memory was vague. “You tested me? How?”
“Ah, you’ve forgotten.”
Chu Lianmo sighed, having to explain in detail.
That day, he visited Qi Xiaojun’s residence as usual, drinking tea and chatting. He casually asked, “Ajun, have you considered staying in Chu forever?”
“No!” Qi Xiaojun’s expression turned serious, “I will eventually return to Qi! Father said when he visited this year that he was actively negotiating with your father…although your father hasn’t agreed, he won’t give up.”
“But if,” Chu Lianmo suppressed his disappointment, “you found someone you like in Chu? You marry him and stay here, wouldn’t that be good?”
“No!” Qi Xiaojun immediately replied, “I don’t want to marry someone from Chu!”
“…Ah, so that’s it…”
Chu Lianmo’s words finally triggered Qi Xiaojun’s memory of this conversation.
“You meant yourself when you talked about liking someone? I only felt that your third sister was interested in me, always pestering me, so when you asked, the person who came to mind was her.”
“…” Chu Lianmo was both amused and helpless, “If it weren’t for this misunderstanding, I might have confessed then. I could have accompanied you back to Qi, but your ‘I don’t want to marry someone from Chu’ blocked everything I wanted to say.”
Qi Xiaojun pouted, “But you ignored me for five whole years! I thought you had forgotten me.”
“…Ajun, I couldn’t help it…”
Chu Lianmo’s eyes reddened, explaining his true feelings at that time.
“At first, I pitied your loneliness, but it was after my mother’s misfortune that I truly empathized with you.
“After Mother lost favor, she shut herself up and didn’t even want to see me. She said seeing me reminded her of Father, that all men are bad.”
Qi Xiaojun felt sympathy for Chu Lianmo’s situation. He was innocent in his parents’ conflict. Saying all men are bad was an exaggeration, but…the phrase “no one in Chu is good” that lingered in his mind for years was also biased.
“As for Father, I had already clashed with him because of Mother, and I no longer trusted him.
“I was with my parents, yet estranged from them. I’d rather be like you, even separated by thousands of miles from your parents, still deeply caring for each other… and your mother, she must have thought of you in heaven.”
Qi Xiaojun held Chu Lianmo’s hand, looking at the moon.
He remembered that Emperor Chu Wen had allowed his father to visit him in Chu every year. In the first year, his father came with his mother, but in the second year, his mother had died of illness due to missing him.
His father wept and confessed, saying he had killed his mother.
Qi Xiaojun and his father hugged and cried, finally agreeing: it wasn’t you, but Emperor Chu Wen who killed Mother.
He finally made peace with his father, uniting against their external enemy.
His father hugged him, comforting him that his deceased mother would always watch over him in heaven.
Since then, Qi Xiaojun liked to look at the moon and stars even more.
Was his mother on the moon? Or had she become one of the stars?
Perhaps this was just a way for the living to console themselves.
Those alive and by his side were more precious.
“Ajun, it’s windy,” Chu Lianmo suddenly changed the subject, “Shall we go inside and continue talking?”
“No need.” Qi Xiaojun tightened his grip on Chu Lianmo’s hand, feeling the warmth of his palm, smiling slightly, “It’s not that cold. Please continue.”
“Good.”
Chu Lianmo continued.
“Because I lost Father’s favor, Chu Wei De, who had always disliked me, could openly oppose me.
“That day, he came to my manor and told me to crawl under his legs.”
“What?” Qi Xiaojun couldn’t believe Chu Wei De would openly bully his own brother.
Chu Lianmo also found it unbelievable.
So initially, he flatly refused, “No way! Even if you kill me, you won’t make me submit to you!”
“You won’t crawl, huh?” Chu Wei De placed his foot on a large stone, laughing arrogantly, “Don’t forget, your mother’s palace is like a cold palace now. My mother is the Empress. Do you think she can deal with her? Maybe she’ll accidentally receive less food or charcoal?”
“Don’t bully my mother!” Chu Lianmo became anxious. Even though his mother didn’t want to see him, she was still the mother he loved.
“I’ll ask you again, will you crawl?” Chu Wei De patted his leg.
“…I…will…” Chu Lianmo squeezed out the words.
Then, he bent down and painfully crawled under Chu Wei De’s legs.
It wasn’t a long process, but the feeling was unforgettable.
“Hahaha!” Chu Wei De laughed maniacally, “I made you show off in front of me! You even beat me in the hunting competition! Try it again! Hahaha, you look like a dog! Come on, bark!”
“Woof, woof.” Chu Lianmo was indifferent. He had already experienced the greatest humiliation.
“Hahahahahaha!”
Chu Wei De withdrew his leg and left, laughing.
That was Chu Lianmo’s situation at the time.
Soon after Chu Wei De left, a servant reported, “Your Highness, Prince Xiao is at the gate.”
Chu Lianmo felt a pang of bitterness.
It’s easy to add flowers to a flourishing scene, but difficult to send charcoal in the snow.
He had sent charcoal to Qi Xiaojun when he was at his loneliest, and now Qi Xiaojun was returning the favor.
Someone willing to befriend him in such a situation was indeed someone he had loved wholeheartedly.
But it couldn’t be.
The closer he was to someone, the more likely they would be targeted by Chu Wei De.
Finally, Chu Lianmo gritted his teeth and said, “Tell him I’m not in the mood to see him.”
This was why Chu Lianmo had ignored Qi Xiaojun.
“Ajun, I’m sorry…I’m sorry! I know my attitude hurt you, but I couldn’t help it!”
Chu Lianmo hugged Qi Xiaojun and apologized profusely, weeping uncontrollably.
“You fool!” Qi Xiaojun, upon learning the truth, felt a mix of emotions, and leaned on Chu Lianmo’s shoulder, sobbing, “You were protecting me! But I was a hostage, Chu Wei De wouldn’t dare to do anything to me for the sake of Chu’s image, why did you do this? I had already adapted to life in Chu, but you locked yourself away for so many years, how painful that must have been!”
Chu Lianmo had indeed spent five years in extreme pain and loneliness.
Five years later, on the day Qi Xiaojun was to leave Chu, he hid in the shadows and watched him leave until he disappeared from sight.
Although Chu Lianmo was heartbroken, he was also happy for Qi Xiaojun because he could finally return to his beloved homeland.
Then, two more years passed.
That year, a rebellion broke out on Chu’s border. The border guards fought bravely but were defeated and requested reinforcements from the capital.
Emperor Chu Wen asked who would lead the troops, and Chu Lianmo immediately volunteered.
Before that, Emperor Chu Wen had almost forgotten his quiet son.
Chu Lianmo was incredibly brave on the border, winning battles and defeating the enemy army, quickly returning victorious.
Emperor Chu Wen was overjoyed and greatly rewarded Chu Lianmo.
Chu Lianmo no longer had to cower. At that time, he had thought of going to Qi to propose to Qi Xiaojun.
But shortly afterward, Chu demanded increased tributes from Qi, and after being rejected, attacked Qi.
The two countries became enemies. Chu Lianmo knew that his deep-seated wish would never come true.
Even the fifth prince, Chu Lianqiu, had married. Chu Lianmo was forced by his father and finally agreed.
After his wedding, he took concubines. Everyone said he suddenly became promiscuous, but no one knew that the reason he took concubines was because they resembled Qi Xiaojun. Yin Mei, the most “favored,” was the one who looked most like Qi Xiaojun.
No one knew that Chu Lianmo got drunk every wedding night.
On the day he heard of Qi Xiaojun’s death, he punched the wall repeatedly, until his hands were bloody.