Chapter 67: Debt
It was twilight. No candles were lit in the hall. The evening glow leaked through the pale grass curtains, the light soft and dim.
Zhao Yiyi had just woken up from her afternoon nap; she had only rested at the hour of Shen (3-5 PM) today, so right now she lay half-prone on the couch, unwilling to move.
The muffled and soft voice entered his ears, causing his heart to soften subconsciously. His tone also involuntarily lightened a lot. “It is already August. We have been in Chang’an for so many days; it is time to go back.”
The August wind already carried a chill. Zhao Yiyi had a thin blanket draped over her. When she turned her head to look at him, the thin blanket slipped down slightly.
She pulled at the blanket, then frowned and said, “But this concubine feels Chang’an is quite good and does not want to return to Luoyang.”
Noticing her unhappiness, Gu Zhen simply smiled. His eyes grew even gentler as he said warmly, “It is almost Mid-Autumn. When others are having family reunions, will you make Zhen go back alone and lonely? You once said you wanted to see the lanterns; shall Zhen take you this year?”
“Not going. Chang’an also has lantern festivals, much better looking than Luoyang’s.” Zhao Yiyi turned her body. Before she could turn away completely, he grabbed her arm.
Gu Zhen suddenly felt afraid.
Afraid he would really lose her.
“Yiyi.” Gu Zhen closed his eyes, trying his best to suppress the trembling in his heart. He whispered, “Come home with Zhen, alright?”
He gripped her arm very tightly, causing a bit of pain. His calloused palm pressed closely against her skin through the layer of gauze; the warm and slightly rough touch abraded her until it hurt.
Zhao Yiyi frowned slightly and struggled to break free, but she couldn’t pull out immediately, so she just turned her back to him and refused to speak.
“Come home with Zhen, Yiyi. When we return to Chang’an, it will be early autumn. Zhen will take you to see the autumn colors at Longmen, then to see the ginkgo trees at Yuqing Temple. And I hear the maple forest at Beimang has grown much more lush.” Gu Zhen’s voice was hoarse, almost pleading, and there was even a nearly imperceptible choke in his voice.
The window was not closed, and gusts of wind blew in. The thin blanket finally slid to the floor.
Gu Zhen bent down to pick it up, shook it out gently, and intended to drape it over her knees again.
Zhao Yiyi looked up at him, then lowered her eyelids and whispered, “That is Bixia‘s home.”
The soft voice, light as a cloud, was as gentle and sweet as usual, yet it made Gu Zhen’s chest tighten and gradually cramp up.
Then, it was as if fine needles were suddenly stabbed into him. Sharp, piercing pain drilled straight into the marrow of his bones, causing his breathing to stop for an instant and his body to turn cold inch by inch.
There was no doubt; these words were meant to break his heart.
A light sentence, yet every word was incredibly sharp, ultimately combining into a blade that stabbed into his heart without reservation.
The pain in his heart tugged at the injury on his ribs, causing it to throb in agony.
But did he have a way to avoid it?
Gu Zhen gritted his teeth tightly. His internal organs seemed to burn along with it; the fire spread bit by bit, burning until his whole body went stiff.
Recalling the past, a layer of desolation surfaced on Gu Zhen’s face.
Although he considered Yiyi his wife, his actions over these years showed not a single trace of treating her as a wife or respecting her as one.
Let alone standing up for her, he feared he didn’t even know where she had suffered grievances.
It wasn’t that there was no way to know; he just hadn’t cared.
No wonder Yiyi felt that the towering, magnificent palace was not her home.
Gu Zhen’s breathing was slightly rapid. He closed his eyes, his eyelashes trembling incessantly. The hand holding her arm moved down cautiously, unexpectedly touching her soft hand.
After a momentary daze, he suddenly grasped her hand in his palm.
Afraid that if he grasped it a moment too late, she would fly away immediately.
“Bixia.” Zhao Yiyi frowned, wanting to break free. Finding herself firmly held by him, she couldn’t help but say annoyedly, “It hurts…”
Gu Zhen’s voice trembled as he whispered, “The palace servants have all been punished. Zhen has also warned the Empress Dowager. In the future, no one in the palace will dare to slight or bully you again.”
“Don’t be like this, Yiyi.” Feeling increasingly terrible in his heart, he said softly, “Come home with Zhen.”
Being gripped so tightly by him, Zhao Yiyi was naturally uncomfortable.
After struggling for a good while without success, she became annoyed and simply pushed him recklessly with her hand. “Bixia, let go. Bixia asked why this concubine doesn’t want to go back; this concubine will tell you.”
That soft hand happened to push right onto his injury. Heart-piercing pain suddenly shot up, and Gu Zhen’s expression changed instantly.
Zhao Yiyi was stunned at first, then turned her face away and continued, “This concubine likes Chang’an simply because there isn’t a single bad memory of Chang’an, and even more because this is this concubine’s home. Although the Daqing Hall in Luoyang is magnificent and has countless palace maids, it is only Bixia‘s home.”
“Bixia says to let this concubine go home together, but who has ever treated that place as this concubine’s home?”
Whether it was the palace servants or others, who had ever truly treated her with respect? Even he himself in the beginning—wasn’t he full of indifference and coldness?
Thinking about it, Zhao Yiyi felt inexplicably aggrieved and suddenly laughed. Only, that smile reflected some bitterness.
The knife scraped against his flesh, stroke by stroke. The hand Gu Zhen rested on his knee clenched tightly. He reached out tremblingly to pull her hand, whispering, “Yiyi, Zhen knows, Zhen knows it all…”
“In the past, Zhen owed you a great debt.” Enduring the pain in his ribs, he spoke with difficulty, “For the rest of our lives, let Zhen make it up to you properly, alright?”
His face was pale. When he spoke, it was difficult to even get a complete sentence out. He recounted word by word, only short of using the word ‘beg’.
Zhao Yiyi glanced at him, pursed her lips, and after a long while asked somewhat awkwardly, “What is wrong with Bixia?”
Gu Zhen forced a smile. “Zhen is fine.”
He fingered the stray hair falling on both sides of her face and coaxed, “Alright, get up quickly to have the evening meal. If you sleep any longer, you won’t be able to sleep tonight, and won’t you cry about a headache again tomorrow?”
Saying so, he took the pomegranate-red skirt hanging nearby and handed it to her, saying softly, “Be good, get up and eat.”
Zhao Yiyi reluctantly took the skirt and slowly shifted to change her clothes.
Although she said she didn’t want to return to Chang’an, she knew herself that it was because she was unhappy inside.
There were still many matters in Luoyang waiting to be handled; how could she not return?
“By the way.” Gu Zhen suddenly hooked his lips into a smile, took out two small clay figurines from his sleeve, and handed them to her. “Yesterday you went to the Western Suburbs. When Zhen went to pick you up, I bought these while riding through the market.”
Pausing, he added, “The wine-preserved goose you mentioned that day, Zhen also ordered people to buy it today.”
This clay figurine was something she had said she wanted early on. That day, the West Market was about to close, so she had to leave resentfully. Unexpectedly, he had remembered it.
Zhao Yiyi was stunned.
Although called clay figurines, one was actually a little girl, and the other was a puppy.
Zhao Yiyi pinched these two little things in her fingertips, playing with them blankly for a good while before coming back to her senses.
“Do you like them?” Gu Zhen asked her.
Zhao Yiyi nodded and responded, “Mm.”
Among young ladies of the same age, Zhao Duanduan didn’t go out much and rarely attended banquets.
Now encountering this situation, she went out even less, just staying at home all day teasing Ah Huang (the dog). In just a dozen days, she had forcibly fed Ah Huang until he was a full circle fatter.
When Zhao Chen returned from the Imperial College and saw Ah Huang, he said he was fatter, but she stubbornly refused to admit it, saying Ah Huang had just grown up.
Ah Huang grew a circle fatter, but she herself lost a full circle of weight.
Her face, originally only the size of a palm, became increasingly thin and pitiful, making her eyes look even larger. Her expression was also haggard, the usual blush on her cheeks vanished.
Eldest Sister wasn’t here, and Eldest Brother still had to manage the family’s sundry affairs. Seeing her like this, Zhao Chen felt a bit of heartache and asked, “Second Sister, no need to go to the Imperial College these two days. Shall I take you out of the city for a walk?”
Zhao Duanduan didn’t intend to agree, but seeing Zhao Chen’s bright eyes, her heart softened, and she nodded. “Fine, go prepare the horses.”
The two didn’t stay in the city. They rode along the Imperial Street out of the city gates to gallop in the suburbs.
The autumn wind was rising, and Luoyang was gradually getting cold. There were quite a few people riding out of the city at this time.
Because many open spaces were occupied, the two didn’t stop, riding straight ahead. By the Luo River, a group of young men were competing in horsemanship. Zhao Duanduan glanced curiously, and after spotting that familiar figure, she immediately whipped her horse and rode over.
The dust kicked up by the hooves blocked her vision. Only when she reached a secluded place did she slowly rein in the horse.
But the sound of hoofbeats followed her, speeding up and slowing down with her movements, finally blocking her path. An urgent voice called out, “Duanduan!”
Zhao Duanduan snatched the reins from his hands, her brow cold and indifferent. “Gentleman Cui, please conduct yourself with dignity. Acting like this does not befit your status.”
“Duanduan, this matter is our family’s fault, causing you to suffer such grievance.” Cui Siyuan’s face was pale. He spoke with a hint of panic, his hand gripping the reins trembling slightly.
Zhao Duanduan ignored him, simply replying with a smile, “If Gentleman Cui wants to quell my anger, then you should ask yourself: Can a broken mirror be restored? Can words already spoken be taken back?”
Taking advantage of Cui Siyuan’s daze, she suddenly flicked the whip backward, causing his horse to stumble. She said in a deep voice, “Since it cannot be done, Gentleman Cui should stay far away. We shall each go about our own business.”
In his memory, the once bright and colorful young girl disappeared, merging and separating from the person before him.
Thinking of their past intimacy, Cui Siyuan’s chest was so blocked he couldn’t speak.
It wasn’t that he hadn’t tried to do something, wanting to coax her to change her mind.
But it was futile.
Cui Siyuan felt increasingly terrible. His outstretched hand dropped weakly. After a long while, he finally said, “Alright, I understand.” Since she was unwilling, in the future, he would just treat the past as bygone.
Before turning away, he gave a final smile. “You are not on good terms with that Miss Zuo, right? In the future, you won’t have to be.”
Zhao Duanduan didn’t know what he meant at first. It wasn’t until the next day when the Marquis of Hejian personally came to the door, bringing countless gifts of apology and mentioning that the Zuo family had severed ties with Zuo Lianzhi, that she gradually came to her senses.
The Marquis of Hejian wore a smile and said warmly, “Trouble Second Miss and Second Gentleman to pass a message to Empress Niangniang. Please ask Niangniang to rest assured; our family will certainly think what Niangniang thinks and worry about what Niangniang worries about.”
“I heard the Marquis of Hejian went to the Zuo family a few days ago and also brought quite a few things.” Zhao Chen whispered a sentence, looking at the gifts sent by the Marquis with some trepidation.
Fingering the gift list in her hand, Zhao Duanduan ordered, “Send someone to Lanruo Temple to visit Father. Incidentally… tell this news to Elder Sister Zuo and Madam Xu, so they can be happy too.”
From what she heard of the Marquis of Hejian’s meaning just now, he intended to act on Elder Sister’s behalf?
“Since someone proactively offers to be a knife for Elder Sister.” Zhao Duanduan looked up at Zhao Chen and smiled slowly. “That is truly wonderful.”
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