Chapter 31: Shifting Affections â Does… Ah Yan like him? Part 1
After kicking Jiang Yan out, the room finally fell quiet.
He turned off the light, sank into the soft duvet, and let out a long sigh of relief.
He thought heâd get a good sleep, but instead, he tossed and turned, unable to brew a single drop of drowsiness. The image of Jiang Yanâs stunned expression standing outside the door kept floating involuntarily into his mind. Those eyes, which always looked at him with such focus, had actually revealed a hint of confusion, like an abandoned puppy. It made him feel a bit cruel.
I wonder if heâs asleep yet? Given his stamina, probably not that fast.
So right now, what is he doing?
The thought that Jiang Yan might be watching the video he sentâwhether out of curiosity or to satisfy a needâmade Jiang Yunianâs chest feel clogged with a delayed sense of regret.
He couldn’t quite describe the feeling; it was just stuffy, like he had done something wrong but didn’t know exactly what.
His mind wandered chaotically, and sleep completely vanished.
He sat up in the dark and reached out to touch the cup of honey water on the nightstand. The glass still held residual warmthâJiang Yan had brought it just now, placing the handle facing exactly the direction he was used to. He was always like this, thoughtful to the point of making one feel overwhelmed.
He took tiny sips, sweetness spreading across his tongue. After finishing, he licked his lips and gently set the cup down.
Unable to sleep, he turned on the nightlight again, casting a warm yellow glow over the head of the bed. Jiang Yunian propped a pillow behind his back, planning to scroll through Weibo to distract himself.
The post he made earlier had already sunk to the bottom, with very few new comments. Bored, he scrolled through the abstract teasing again until he saw a thought-provoking question.
[CP Spokesperson]: The OP keeps emphasizing he likes girls, but has he never doubted his brother’s sexual orientation?
Sexual orientation?
Jiang Yan?
The screen’s light reflected on his eyelashes as they trembled slightly. Jiang Yanâs face uncontrollably surfaced in his mind again. That face, always cold to others, revealed that clingy expression only for him. The intimate contact without avoidance, and the shock and grievance in his eyes just now when he was pushed out the door…
He had preemptively assumed Jiang Yan was like him and liked girls, but he had never considered the other possibility.
Does… Ah Yan like him?
This thought startled him into a cold sweat. It grew wildly like weeds in his heart, but he hurriedly suppressed it.
Jiang Yan usually adopted an attitude of “strangers keep away,” treating men and women equally indifferently. That didn’t prove anything. He was the only person Jiang Yan trusted, so it was understandable for him to be close. Dependence was not the same as romantic like, and inferring based on a vague sentence was too rash.
Jiang Yunian was conservative to the bone; he couldn’t quite accept this kind of speculation.
He deleted the post, chanting “impossible” in his heart repeatedly, then buried his face deep into the pillow, curling his body into a ball with a trace of unease.
Whether his method had worked or for some other reason, Jiang Yan indeed calmed down a lot over the next few days. Aside from being as clingy as usual, he didn’t pester him with any excessive requests. Everything seemed natural, no different from normal people.
Jiang Yunian couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief.
The cafeteria wasn’t crowded. Jiang Yunian lowered his head, poking at the broccoli on his tray, lacking appetite. In his peripheral vision, Jiang Yan was focused on picking bones out of a fish, his profile looking exceptionally soft.
“Are you going to be busy until late again today?” Jiang Yunian asked.
Jiang Yan naturally placed a piece of de-boned fish into his bowl. “Mmh.”
This practiced motion reminded him of the time at the food stall when Jiang Yan peeled shrimp for him. He didn’t know if brothers in other families went to this extent, but Jiang Yan did.
Since when had he become so accustomed to being taken care of by Jiang Yan without noticing anything wrong?
“Why aren’t you eating?”
Jiang Yunian snapped back to reality and shook his head to signal he was really full, but his protest was invalidâtwo more pieces of meat appeared in his bowl.
“Ge is too thin. Eat more meat.” Jiang Yan’s tone was gentle but brooked no refusal.
In situations like this, Jiang Yunianâs persistence was meaningless. He could only obediently open his mouth and resign himself to finishing the rest of the food. Today’s meat dish was really greasy; it smeared around his mouth, feeling sticky and uncomfortable.
“Don’t move.” Jiang Yan pulled out a tissue and leaned in naturally.
As his breath suddenly encroached and his fingertips were about to touch the corner of his mouth, Jiang Yunian subconsciously turned his head away, his heart skipping a beat.
Jiang Yanâs hand paused in mid-air, his eyelids lifting indifferently.
In the stagnant air, time seemed to stretch slowly, making the surrounding noise seem exceptionally distant. Jiang Yunian lowered his eyes and took the tissue. “I’ll do it myself.”
Jiang Yan didn’t speak. His black eyes quietly watched his movements, his gaze deep and heavy.
It was getting late, and Jiang Yan stood up to leave. As he was going, Jiang Yunian couldn’t help but call out to him.
He turned sideways slightly, waiting for him to speak.
Jiang Yunian pursed his lips and said, “Come home early.”
He regretted it as soon as he said it. The words sounded too intimate, like a wife instructing a husband.
And in broad daylight, in public, no less.
Jiang Yanâs brows softened. He took the opportunity to press his hand on the top of Jiang Yunianâs head. “Okay.”
Jiang Yunianâs eyelashes trembled, and the roots of his ears quietly turned red.
In the restroom, the faucet was running.
Jiang Yunian lowered his head to wash his hands, the cold water temporarily calming the restlessness in his heart. When he looked up, he saw He Qing leaning against the doorframe in the mirror, silent. He didn’t know how long he had been standing there.
“He Qing?” Jiang Yunian turned off the tap, his hands still wet. “What are you doing standing there?”
He Qingâs gaze swept over his hair, which had been pressed flat and soft. “Waiting for someone.”
“Oh, then I’ll head out first.”
“Wait.”
Jiang Yunian turned back. “Is something the matter?”
He Qingâs expression was complex, holding a measure of scrutiny. He had waited here on purpose. In the hall just now, he had taken in the intimate behavior between the two. Last time in the cafeteria, seeing Jiang Yanâs loss of composure and that look that seemed ready to devour people, he found it hard to imagine that kind of lunatic being serious about anyone.
“I saw everything.” He Qing paused, then asked hesitantly, “Are you and him…”
Jiang Yunianâs heart jumped, a faint unease rising.
Even He Qing noticed something was wrong between him and Jiang Yan… was this the keen intuition of a gay man?
He rubbed his nose awkwardly. “He’s my younger brother… haven’t I said that before?”
“Brother?” He Qing raised an eyebrow slightly. What kind of roleplay was this?
Remembering Zhou Shuâs previous warning, he became unsure again.
“Yeah, doesn’t he look like it?”
“He doesn’t.”
“…”
He Qing naturally knew how Jiang Yan became his “brother,” so he pointedly remarked, “He looks a lot like a friend of mine.”
Someone with Jiang Yanâs looks was hard to find a second of, even with a lantern.
He had said before that he resembled a friend. Although he felt it was unlikely He Qing would be interested in Jiang Yan, Jiang Yunian still felt inexplicably uncomfortable. “Where do they look alike?”
He Qingâs face turned a bit colder. “Neither looks like a good person.”
This was the second time.
Sure enough, after staying with Zhou Shu for too long, the words coming out of his mouth weren’t very pleasant either.
Jiang Yunian couldn’t stand hearing others speak ill of Jiang Yan. “What’s not good about him? Do you always judge people by appearance like this?”
He Qing was stunned, looking at him with an indescribable expression. It was hard to connect the “very good person” in his mouth with the paranoid, gloomy man in his memories. He recalled that rainy night years ago, those hollow eyes of Jiang Yan holding a woman’s corpse, and couldn’t help shivering.
He Qing swallowed a mouthful of saliva in disgust and muttered, “Someone who hangs out with that guy named Zhou can’t be any good.”
“Zhou Shu?” Jiang Yunian frowned. What did this have to do with Ah Yan?
Realizing he had let something slip, before He Qing could salvage it, his phone rang.
It was Zhou Shu.
He answered lukewarmly: “Speak.”
The tone on the other end wasn’t great either. “Not coming over tonight.”
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