Chapter 98: The Cannon Fodder in a Dogblood Novel (98)
The expression on Li Qiulan’s face violently cracked. The light in his eyes thoroughly darkened. His lowered hand clenched fiercely, his nails digging deep, crescent-shaped marks into his palms…
The air stagnated for a few seconds.
He hooked his lips into a bitter smile, as if he hadn’t heard Shen Tangqing’s words, and said hoarsely, “I’ll go run the bathwater for you.”
After saying this, without waiting for Shen Tangqing to respond, he almost frantically maneuvered his wheelchair into the bathroom.
Shen Tangqing frowned severely. He felt as if he had punched cotton. Displeased.
After a while, Li Qiulan came out of the bathroom. His head hung slightly low, his eyelids drooping. A few loose strands of hair fell over his forehead, obscuring his expression.
Shen Tangqing’s entire body was weak; he couldn’t even walk normally, let alone take a shower. Li Qiulan hesitated for a moment, then bent down, scooped him up from the bed, and carried him into the steam-filled bathroom.
…
By the time they came out of the bathroom again, Shen Tangqing was wrapped in a very soft bathrobe. Li Qiulan carefully placed him on the bed before speaking softly, his tone full of humble ingratiation. “Brother, are you hungry? Do you want a midnight snack?”
Shen Tangqing kept his eyes closed and coldly spat out a single word: “Scram.”
Li Qiulan’s gaze landed on Shen Tangqing’s face. Silence spread throughout the room. Finally, he said nothing, his Adam’s apple just bobbing violently. He really did leave the room.
…
It wasn’t until the sound of the door gently closing that Shen Tangqing opened his eyes. His hollow gaze stared at the ceiling. After a long while, one of his hands draped weakly over his forehead, covering his eyes.
———
Li Qiulan did not return to his own room. Instead, he went straight to the study. He sat alone in the darkness, like a dead, silent statue. The words Shen Tangqing had spoken echoed repeatedly in his mind: If you can’t live, then go die… It was like a poison-laced curse frantically circling in his head.
He didn’t know how long passed before he violently snapped out of it, his eyes surging with an almost maddening obsession. He turned on the lights. Standing up from his wheelchair extremely slowly, he walked step by step toward the desk. From the very bottom drawer, he pulled out a dagger.
Li Qiulan’s fingertips gripped the dagger tightly, the cold metal biting painfully into his palm. Yet this pain was far less agonizing than the pain Shen Tangqing’s words had caused him…
If I died, would Brother’s heart ache? This thought, like wildly growing weeds, instantly swallowed all his sanity. A sick light burst from his eyes. Then he slowly lowered his gaze, the blade reflecting his pale, vacant face. His Adam’s apple bobbed heavily, and he murmured hoarsely, “Brother, if I died, would you feel even the slightest bit sad?”
He slowly raised his wrist, pressing the sharp edge against his delicate skin. The chill spread along his veins, his heart pounding violently from that sliver of mad anticipation.
He began to imagine frantically. Imagining what he would look like lying in a pool of blood. Imagining Shen Tangqing seeing his corpse—Would the coldness and disgust on his face dissipate just a little? Would he be a little bit sad?
Just picturing such a scene made his dry eye sockets grow slightly hot.
After a long while, he tremblingly raised his hand, touching the teeth marks on his collarbone that had already begun to scab. That insane thought in his mind slowly extinguished again. The hand gripping the dagger slowly dropped down.
Clang— The dagger fell onto the cold floor. He leaned against the desk, slid down to the floor, and buried his face deeply in the crook of his arms. Muffled, suppressed sobs spilled from his throat.
In the end, he didn’t dare to gamble. It wasn’t that he feared death. It was the fear that even in death, he couldn’t exchange it for even half a fraction of Shen Tangqing’s heartache. And he couldn’t bear to “leave” Shen Tangqing.
———
The next day, just after Li Qiulan had finished serving Shen Tangqing his breakfast, Mo Zeyan’s car parked in front of the villa.
He looked at Mo Zeyan, his tone thick with undisguised hostility. “What are you doing here?”
Mo Zeyan maintained his usual nonchalant demeanor. A faint smile graced his lips, and his voice was calm. “You found him?”
Li Qiulan’s face instantly darkened, filled with annoyance. He felt as if Mo Zeyan had a goddamn radar installed. The moment he arrived, Mo Zeyan came sniffing right after him. It truly disgusted him to the extreme.
“What does it have to do with you?” Li Qiulan looked at him coldly. “Mo Zeyan, Brother is mine. You’d best not have any ideas about him, otherwise, I can’t guarantee what I’ll do.”
Mo Zeyan adjusted the glasses on his nose, not bothered by Li Qiulan calling him by his full name or his hostility. “Qiuqiu, imprisoning someone is against the law.”
Li Qiulan scoffed, entirely unconcerned. “So what?”
“Let him go.”
Li Qiulan gave a low laugh, though the smile didn’t reach his eyes. He looked at Mo Zeyan, ruthlessly tearing down his hypocritical mask. “Mo Zeyan, don’t think I don’t know your thoughts. You’ve always coveted Brother…” As he spoke, a flash of ruthlessness crossed his eyes. “What right do you have to fight me for Brother? How do you even have the face to fight me for him?”
The faint smile on Mo Zeyan’s lips froze. His fingertips gently rubbed against his knee for a moment. Only after a while did he speak slowly, “Qiuqiu, everyone has the right to pursue the person they love.”
“Mo Zeyan, Brother is mine…”
Mo Zeyan shook his head slightly, his voice returning to its previous calmness. “He doesn’t belong to anyone right now. I am taking him away today.”
Li Qiulan abruptly stood up from his wheelchair. “Is that so?” He stared fixedly at Mo Zeyan. “If you want to take him away, you’ll have to do it over my dead body.”
Mo Zeyan’s expression finally turned serious. “Li Qiulan, you always act so impulsively.” He lifted his eyes to look at Li Qiulan, his tone turning cold. “You don’t even know how to hide someone properly. The Qin family has been watching you all along. Hiding him here, how long do you think you can keep it from the Qin family? Maybe the moment I step out the door, the Qin family will come knocking.”
Li Qiulan snorted coldly, his eyes full of mockery. “So what? What are you trying to say? Let me take him abroad? Or hand him over to you?” He looked at Mo Zeyan’s face, his emotions suddenly becoming weirdly calm. He slowly sat back in his wheelchair, meeting Mo Zeyan’s heavy gaze. “Mo Zeyan, seeing you put on this hypocritical, righteous act all these years is really disgusting.”
Li Qiulan’s voice wasn’t loud, but every word fell clearly into Mo Zeyan’s ears. “If you’re not tired of it, I am.”
Mo Zeyan’s face changed drastically. He stared at Li Qiulan, his expression somewhat complicated. After a while, he finally spoke slowly, his voice carrying a trace of imperceptible guilt. “Qiuqiu, back then, I didn’t know that incident would happen…”
Before he could finish, Li Qiulan coldly interrupted him, his eyes filled with disgust. “There’s no need to say any more, Mo Zeyan. I don’t want to see you. As for Shen Tangqing, I will never hand him over to you… No matter what intentions you have towards him, he is mine. I won’t allow you to taint him.” Li Qiulan paused before adding, “As for the Qin family, if they really come knocking, my Li family isn’t exactly a pushover.”
“Qiuqiu, you’re being too willful. When your mother finds out…”
Mo Zeyan was halfway through his sentence when Li Qiulan sharply cut him off. “Mo Zeyan, that woman is not my mother. Get the hell out of here right now.”
Li Qiulan didn’t look at Mo Zeyan again, maneuvering his wheelchair upstairs.
Mo Zeyan watched his back until he disappeared at the elevator entrance before slowly withdrawing his gaze. He lowered his eyes. After a long time, he finally forced a bitter smile onto his lips. Although he wasn’t aware of the incident back then, it was true… it was his Mo family that had wronged Li Qiulan.
He looked up out the window. What was Li Qiulan like in the past? He loved to smile, always following behind him, calling him ‘Little Uncle’… Unfortunately, they could never go back to the past.
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