Chapter 13: Physical Contact
Xie Shibai regretted bringing it up a little; Lu Ciheng was simply too noisy.
Lu Ciheng said, “Honey, why aren’t you speaking? You wouldn’t really find someone else to help you, right?”
He thought of something, his gaze darkening deeply. His lips turned down, looking somewhat displeased. “Who do you want to find? It wouldn’t be that guy named Song Yi from before, right?”
Xie Shibai looked slightly confused. He recalled for a while before remembering that Song Yi was one of the contract candidates from before, the one who sprayed himself with cheap perfume to cover the smell of alcohol.
“Why would you think of him?”
Lu Ciheng’s black eyes stared tightly at Xie Shibai. He hadn’t expected that Xie Shibai would remember that person’s name just from his casual mention. “There were so many resumes on the table, yet you were holding his. Wasn’t he memorable?”
Xie Shibai sounded confused at the end of his sentence. “His resume was on the very top, and he was the first person I contacted that day.”
But that day didn’t start smoothly. After contacting Song Yi, he had waited abruptly for twenty minutes. Just as he was preparing to contact someone else, Lu Ciheng had pushed the door open and entered.
Song Yi wasn’t anything special. On the contrary, because of the cheap perfume, Xie Shibai didn’t have a good impression of him.
Why would he remember an irrelevant person so clearly?
“I won’t find him to help me with desensitization therapy.”
Lu Ciheng’s lips hooked up. “Then why did you think of finding me? Am I very special?”
Xie Shibai pondered for a few seconds. He wouldn’t tell Lu Ciheng the real reason was that the contact reaction was minimal. He said casually, “Specially durable.”
If only he were a bit quieter, he’d be perfect.
Lu Ciheng: “?”
He laughed lightly. “Honey, isn’t that a bit too blunt?”
Xie Shibai spoke honestly. Judging from yesterday, Lu Ciheng wasn’t a petty person. He was open-minded and cheerful; aside from talking a lot and being a bit noisy, he didn’t have many shortcomings. Even family members couldn’t guarantee tolerance for a sick person, let alone a stranger helping with contact disorder treatment.
Chen Yi had indicated that his illness was difficult to handle, as had the doctors he contacted before.
Illness brings burdens to people.
So do sick people.
If Lu Ciheng didn’t agree, he could understand. Perhaps at the start, it wouldn’t feel like a burden, but over time, a person’s patience would be ground away.
“I hope you can consider this seriously,” Xie Shibai said. “Desensitization therapy isn’t something that can be finished in a few days. Several months, a year, or even failing to cure it are all possible. This isn’t a joke.”
Xie Shibai added, “If you are unwilling, I can re-evaluate the feasibility of filming the movie. This won’t affect our cooperation.”
If the treatment failed, and neither medication nor sedation could control it, he would have to find a new lead actor.
At that time, he might never be able to touch this industry again, or even live a normal life.
Lu Ciheng said seriously, “Teacher Xie, I have always kept my word. If I agree, I will definitely see it through to the end.”
“However, Teacher Xie, can you do it?” Lu Ciheng spoke unhurriedly. “Forced to have contact with the ‘me’ you hate… once desensitization therapy starts, you can’t stop.”
His black eyes stared tightly at Xie Shibai, lips hooked, tone containing a smile. “Teacher Xie, you really won’t run away?”
Xie Shibai replied, “Of course not. Provided you really follow the desensitization methods proposed by the doctor.”
The plan provided by Chen Yi was to first classify anxiety levels, proceeding from light to heavy with exposure therapy for the fears, preventing the contact phobia from worsening and generalizing further until it completely restricted Xie Shibai’s life.
Lu Ciheng read through the plan provided by Chen Yi once. “Teacher Xie, have you classified your anxiety levels?”
Xie Shibai paused for a few seconds. “Not yet.”
Lu Ciheng’s knuckles tapped on the paper plan provided by Chen Yi, flipping to the page with the specifically empty classification table. “Write it now.”
Xie Shibai held the fountain pen, pausing for a long time before putting pen to paper.
Writing out the degrees of fear and anxiety was tantamount to laying out his illness in front of someone else.
After a few seconds of silence, Xie Shibai began to fill it out step by step.
10%: Touching items contacted by others.
20%: Being touched unconsciously by others on the limbs.
30%: Others actively shaking hands.
40%: Others actively hugging me.
50%: Being touched on the arm.
60%: Contact with people in a crowded space.
70%: Actively holding hands with someone.
80%: Actively hugging someone.
90%: Actively letting someone touch my head.
100%——
“I’m done.” Xie Shibai pushed the filled form in front of Lu Ciheng.
Lu Ciheng looked at the last item. “The last one is empty?”
Xie Shibai lowered his eyes. “I don’t know what to write.”
He had clearly recorded all the sources of fear, but for the last one alone, Xie Shibai couldn’t put pen to paper when filling it out.
When calculating the sources of fear, Xie Shibai originally thought he was clear that his greatest fear was having his head touched. But when filling it out, it felt incredibly strange. Ninety percent of the fear sources couldn’t be filled in. Xie Shibai vaguely felt that something had been forgotten by him.
Xie Shibai looked at it a few times and said, “I’ll add it later. Let’s start training from 10% anxiety now.”
Xie Shibai: “Start now?”
Lu Ciheng curved his lips. “Of course. Treating an illness naturally should be done as soon as possible.”
“First, start with touching items that have been touched by someone.”
Xie Shibai took a deep breath. Although his heart was beating a bit fast, he was prepared.
Lu Ciheng put the plan aside. Instead of handing the plan sheet to him as Xie Shibai imagined, he turned and walked toward the wet bar. “Does Teacher Xie drink coffee?”
Xie Shibai didn’t understand what he wanted to do, but still followed. “Aren’t we doing treatment?”
Lu Ciheng walked to the coffee machine. With practiced movements, he ground the beans and brewed a cup of coffee, then naturally handed the thing he had touched to Xie Shibai.
“Taste it?”
Xie Shibai paused. His gaze fixed on the coffee Lu Ciheng brewed. The air was filled with a thick, bitter aroma; it smelled quite good. However, Lu Ciheng deliberately didn’t hold the handle. The cup had been touched by his large palm; practically the entire body of the cup had been contacted.
Xie Shibai subconsciously wanted to grab the handle. Before his slender fingers could touch it, Lu Ciheng shifted position, moving the handle away.
He was determined not to let Xie Shibai touch anything else.
Lu Ciheng’s lips hooked into a smile. “Teacher Xie, didn’t we agree to do desensitization training? When will you successfully treat it if you don’t touch anything?”
Xie Shibai’s curled fingers tightened. He took a deep breath and reached out to take the coffee cup from Lu Ciheng’s hand.
The coffee temperature was just right.
Xie Shibai gathered his focus, trying his best not to touch Lu Ciheng’s fingers, and took the coffee cup bit by bit. But inevitably, his fingers unconsciously brushed past Lu Ciheng’s hand.
Anxiety gradually emerged with the action. Xie Shibai nearly failed to hold the coffee cup steady.
Enduring the anxiety, he took the cup with slightly trembling fingertips.
Lu Ciheng noticed Xie Shibai’s movements but didn’t intervene. After he took the coffee cup, he even gave appropriate encouragement.
Xie Shibai looked at the coffee in the cup, momentarily at a loss for how to start. Usually, when touching coffee cups outside, he would satisfy his OCD by wiping them many times before drinking. This time, he hadn’t even wiped it.
After struggling for a long time, Xie Shibai finally drank the first sip of coffee.
Surprisingly, the coffee tasted very good.
Xie Shibai’s eyelashes trembled slightly. He looked up at Lu Ciheng in surprise.
Not only was his cooking edible, but the coffee he brewed was surprisingly good too.
Lu Ciheng: “How is the taste?”
Xie Shibai pursed his lips. “It’s alright.”
Lu Ciheng chuckled lightly, giving a random reply to the read message. “En, looks like it’s delicious. Teacher Xie has a very high evaluation of me.”
After Xie Shibai finished drinking, he took the empty cup away and encouraged Xie Shibai’s behavior just now. “Teacher Xie, you did very well. Completed two items in one go.”
Ten percent and twenty percent—the two most basic items.
The plan formulated by Chen Yi was to solidify continuously on the basis of completion until simple contact would not trigger the condition.
The transition of the first two items was quite easy to adapt to. After a day of repeated taking and retrieving, Xie Shibai didn’t trigger severe somatic reactions aside from anxiety, and even the pain in his arm was slight.
When Xie Shibai felt he had adapted, Lu Ciheng proposed trying thirty percent.
Lu Ciheng was very enthusiastic about helping Xie Shibai with desensitization therapy. He placed his hand in front of Xie Shibai, excited. “Honey, shall we try thirty percent?”
Xie Shibai looked at Lu Ciheng’s hand and subconsciously took a half-step back. “The progress is too fast.”
Spending the whole day taking things, he thought he had started desensitization, but without the barrier of objects, his heart still raced, and a wave of agitation spread through his emotions.
Lu Ciheng carefully flipped through Chen Yi’s plan sheet. “According to the doctor’s plan, we just need to consolidate steps one and two, then proceed to the third step of desensitization therapy.”
Just as Xie Shibai was hesitating, Lu Ciheng reached out and held Xie Shibai’s hand.
Ten fingers touched. Lu Ciheng’s palm was broad and warm, the distinct thin calluses touching the skin. He warmly wrapped around Xie Shibai’s palm, imprisoning it firmly.
Just that one touch made Xie Shibai’s nerves suddenly tense, like a cat with its fur standing on end.
He subconsciously wanted to pull his hand back, but was held firmly.
The broad palm didn’t use much strength, yet could tightly hold the slender hand. Ten fingers slowly interlocked, and the two platinum rings pressed together.
Lu Ciheng closed the distance with Xie Shibai. His black eyes stared focusedly at Xie Shibai, observing carefully, ready to let go if Xie Shibai showed signs of somatic reaction. His tone was low. “Teacher Xie, you said you wouldn’t run.”
Xie Shibai’s heart beat fast. Under the sudden explosion of anxiety, his breathing was slightly rapid. He tried his best to suppress the agitated emotions; he wasn’t quite adapted to this kind of contact yet.
Reaching his limit of endurance, Xie Shibai shook off Lu Ciheng’s hand. The hand that had been as firm as iron just now released very quickly this time.
Lu Ciheng had observed Xie Shibai’s limit.
Smack—
Xie Shibai’s slender fingers trembled imperceptibly. The force of his subconscious swing wasn’t light, slapping a red mark onto the back of Lu Ciheng’s hand.
Lu Ciheng’s brow twitched. Looking at his reddened hand, he feigned a pitiful tone. “Teacher Xie, this is definitely a work injury. No wonder you said I was especially durable; so you were waiting for me here.”
Xie Shibai pressed his lips together. He truly hadn’t controlled his strength subconsciously and had swung a bit too hard.
Lu Ciheng held up his hand for Xie Shibai to see, as if helping him divert his attention. “Teacher Xie, hurry and take a look. Does my hand need to be amputated?”
“?” Xie Shibai’s remaining bit of guilt vanished into smoke. He sneered, “Yes, no saving it. Just wait for death.”
Lu Ciheng looked straight at Xie Shibai, his dragging tone unhurried and containing a bit of teasing. “Teacher Xie, why are you so fierce to your new husband?”
Xie Shibai’s tone was cold. “Amputate the other hand too. For balance.”
Lu Ciheng observed carefully and was relieved to find that Xie Shibai didn’t have a severe adverse reaction.
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