Chapter 32: Being a Cool Guy Isn’t Nearly as Satisfying as Being a Dog for the Wife…
Lu Ciheng squeezed his hand a little too tightly. Xie Shibai glanced sideways, noticing the look in Lu Ciheng’s eyes. He paused for a few seconds before coolly withdrawing his hand from Lu Ciheng’s grip. Habitually, he patted the hand Lu Ciheng still had wrapped around his waist—a signal.
Every hug therapy session ended this way. However, sometimes Lu Ciheng would linger, refusing to move, his chin resting against the side of Xie Shibai’s neck, radiating heat. At first, Xie Shibai hadn’t been used to it, but gradually, he seemed to have built up a tolerance. Most of the time, Xie Shibai didn’t even realize there was anything unusual about it.
From being completely unable to tolerate human contact to now being accustomed to someone always sticking to him—it had only been nearly two months.
Lu Ciheng hesitated for a moment, unwilling to let go in a place crawling with love rivals.
[Screenshots going wild!!!] [LCH is seriously so clingy. I can’t look at his ‘cool guy’ era the same way anymore.] [He’s so jealous. Is it just me, or does the air smell like vinegar whenever someone else gives XSB a gift?] [It’s not just you. It’s the crisis of a simp. Understandable.]
Xie Shibai furrowed his brow slightly. As if it were a conditioned reflex, he raised his hand and patted Lu Ciheng’s face. It was only after the pat landed that he realized they were in front of the camera.
He paused for a few seconds, then said nonchalantly, “Let go.”
The livestream comments had already exploded the moment Xie Shibai raised his hand.
[Damn, damn! Suddenly I feel like LCH has it so good.] [Patting his face isn’t good, right? It feels so disrespectful…] [Why don’t you look at LCH’s expression? He looks like he’s ascending to heaven.] [Ahhh Brother Xie, I don’t want to allow you to hit him!] [Why does it feel like… a reward?] [I told you guys, their arguments are just foreplay.] [No, bro, aren’t you a cool guy? How can you let someone pat your face like that!] [Being a cool guy isn’t nearly as satisfying as being a dog for the wife…]
Lu Ciheng was fine. More than fine, actually. Being patted lightly on the face twice in front of the camera made him feel like a puppy that had just been stamped with a seal of ownership.
He belonged to Xie Shibai, and Xie Shibai belonged to him.
Once Lu Ciheng finally let go, Xie Shibai thanked Su Xingran. “Thank you.”
Su Xingran was still a bit dazed. Recovering his senses, he quickly waved his hand, a smile instantly brightening his face. “As long as Teacher Xie likes it. I was worried you wouldn’t, but now I’m relieved.”
He glanced at Xie Shibai’s hand and swallowed.
Suddenly, setting everything else aside, he felt that if Xie Shibai were to hit him… he could accept that too!
Lu Ciheng keenly sensed this. His gaze turned icy as he swept a glance over Su Xingran, looking like a wolf guarding its food.
Li You’s expression returned to normal. He handed a gift to Lu Ciheng, a smile on his face. “Brother Lu, this is the gift I prepared for you.”
Lu Ciheng glanced at him, took the gift, and muttered a thanks. His gaze then immediately returned to Xie Shibai. He stuck close to his side, lowering his voice with concern. “Teacher Xie, do you want to go wash your hands?”
Xie Shibai glanced at him and whispered, “No.”
Lu Ciheng wouldn’t give up. “Doesn’t it feel uncomfortable? Just go wash them.”
He stared at Xie Shibai’s hands for a while. Xie Shibai’s hands were beautiful—porcelain white, accentuated by the platinum ring. Every time he touched them, they were slightly cool; only after holding them in his own hands for a while would they warm up. Even when Xie Shibai hit him, it didn’t hurt at all. When those slender fingers touched his cheek, there was first a faint scent like cold air, followed by a soft, faint itch.
The most exciting part was that he was the only one who could interlock fingers with Xie Shibai.
But now, Xie Shibai had held something else.
Although Xie Shibai didn’t fully grasp what was going through Lu Ciheng’s mind, in a weird instant, he understood the underlying meaning. Even though he always thought Lu Ciheng’s brain wasn’t quite right, he couldn’t help the fact that they often operated on the same frequency. Their thoughts weren’t identical, but they weren’t far off.
He tugged at the fabric of Lu Ciheng’s sleeve, pulling the man closer.
Lu Ciheng’s dark eyes lit up slightly. Without resisting, he leaned in, following Xie Shibai’s movement. It looked as if he would be happy to be treated this way no matter what.
Xie Shibai moved away from the microphone and deliberately said, “But I touched your face too. Do I still need to wash them?”
Lu Ciheng’s eyes curved into crescents, his smile brilliant. “Otherwise, touch me again to disinfect?”
Xie Shibai: “…Get lost.”
Li You was left hanging on the side, his face full of awkwardness. He tried to say something, only to find that Lu Ciheng and Xie Shibai had already walked away.
The netizens in the livestream room were amused.
[The production team invited these two just to stir up trouble, right?] [I was sweating for them at first, but now I’m dying of laughter.] [They really are such a good match!! As expected of the CP I ship!] [Romance is still best watched when it’s two tops dating.] [But XSB was so calm the whole time. It feels like he didn’t put Li You in his eyes at all.] [Of course. With LCH acting like that, why would he be worried?] [But being a simp for too long gets tiring. A one-sided arrow… XSB never gives back. This unhealthy relationship is too easy to break.] [XSB pulling LCH over just now—you call that a one-sided arrow?] [They are obviously delicious to analyze. An emotionally reserved bottom x enthusiastic big dog top. Especially since LCH still acts like a cool guy to the outside world—the contrast makes it even better to ship!]
Mu Zhenzhen glanced back and forth between them, unable to resist giving Xie Shibai a thumbs up.
No wonder he was so calm just now. That move was too high-level.
It wasn’t just the netizens who were curious about the flying guests; the people on set were curious too.
During lunch, Mu Zhenzhen asked bluntly, “Are you two a couple?”
Li You glanced at Lu Ciheng and quickly denied it. “No, we just teamed up purely for the show.”
Su Xingran nodded in agreement. “Director Tan said he couldn’t find any other guests, so he asked us to make up the numbers. Also, to learn how others fall in love—a preview study.”
[What the hell is previewing falling in love? Su Xingran is still an idol, right? Is it really okay to be on this kind of show?] [First of all, our Ran-ran has graduated from being an idol. His only identity now is an actor.] [Speaking of idols, Li You is the real one, right? He has no works. His most famous moment was just riding the coattails of a hit movie.] [He probably stopped thinking of himself as an idol back when he publicly chased Lu Ciheng. I can only say the fans who spent real money are the most miserable.] [What about LCH and XSB? Aren’t they dating too? No need for double standards.] [Sister upstairs, are you crazy? One is a capable film emperor, the other is a popular actor. Neither relies on fans doing data and spending money like idols. They’re similar in age, so what if they date? Though them dating is truly shocking.] [Does anyone else feel like it’s a good thing they’re dating? If the sister-in-law were someone else, someone high-maintenance…] [If they were high-maintenance, they’d just turn into LCH. Are you satisfied now?] [Laughing to death. No matter which fandom you put yourself in, it’s a breakdown.] [No no no, come join the invincible CP fans. It feels so good, hehe.]
Mu Zhenzhen understood the meaning but couldn’t think of the word to describe it for a moment. “What’s that term called again?”
Xie Shibai: “Pre-fabricated couple.”
“Right!” Mu Zhenzhen nodded repeatedly. “That’s the word.”
[Bursts into laughter.] [Things are looking up; we can even feast on pre-made couples now.] [First there were pre-made dishes, now pre-made couples. Will there be pre-made spouses in the future?]
After everyone exchanged brief greetings, Director Tan appeared to explain the rules for the two “preview couples” and the upcoming activities in the hut.
Before the incident with Yu Rui, the original plan was to go up the mountain to camp and watch the sunrise tomorrow. Because Yu Rui messed up and was boycotted, leaving only Wu Ke in that group, the camping trip—which required setting up tents and other tedious tasks—was deemed inconvenient and postponed.
Now that new guests had joined, Director Tan restarted the camping and sunrise activity.
They would depart at noon tomorrow to climb the mountain, spend the night there, and watch the sunrise together. Everyone was told to start preparing the necessary camping items now.
Tents were indispensable, but since the living allowance provided by the program was very low, they could only haggle to buy the cheapest ones.
The budget was so tight that each group could only buy a very small tent, and even the sleeping bags were the cheap two-in-one kind.
After preparing the camping gear the next day, everyone decided to rest early at the suggestion of the production team, as climbing the mountain would consume a lot of energy.
Xie Shibai had just finished drinking water when he ran into Mu Zhenzhen, who was eating a late-night snack.
Mu Zhenzhen held out a tangerine. “Teacher Xie, want some? It’s very sweet.”
Before Xie Shibai could refuse, the tangerine was stuffed into his hand. Mu Zhenzhen was fast; she didn’t touch his hand, only leaving the tangerine behind before waving and leaving.
Xie Shibai stared at the tangerine for a few seconds. It wouldn’t be polite to put back something given by someone else, so he took it back to his room.
There was no one in the room. The light in the bathroom was on, and a figure could be vaguely seen through the glass door.
He looked away, staring at the room for a few seconds, suddenly feeling that the space was somewhat empty.
He hadn’t had time to cover the camera in the room yet. Xie Shibai slowly peeled the tangerine, planning to cover the lens after eating it.
The clear scent of tangerine gradually spread. He ate a segment, his whole body stiffening, then chewed twice with a blank expression.
When the sound in the bathroom stopped and the door opened, a certain large dog seemed to catch the scent. Having just showered and not dried off completely, carrying a slightly humid vapor, he leaned over. Shirtless, his abs were exposed without reservation, sparing no effort to seduce others into looking at his solid strength.
“Teacher Xie, what are you eating?”
[Feast for the eyes today!] [He’s deliberately not wearing clothes, right?] [Guaranteed. The thought of seduction is just too obvious.]
Xie Shibai remained expressionless. “Tangerine.”
Lu Ciheng’s gaze fell on Xie Shibai’s lips, stained with the scent of tangerine. Leaning in, he could smell the mix of Xie Shibai’s own scent and the fruit. His eyes darkened, and his Adam’s apple rolled. He rested his chin on Xie Shibai’s shoulder, the tip of his high nose brushing against the side of Xie Shibai’s neck as if he hadn’t controlled the distance well.
“Teacher Xie, is the tangerine delicious?”
Xie Shibai glanced at him sideways. “Want some?”
Lu Ciheng stared straight at him, his throat bobbing as he nodded.
Xie Shibai broke off half the tangerine and stuffed it directly into Lu Ciheng’s mouth, his eyes hiding a bit of mischief.
Lu Ciheng hadn’t expected Xie Shibai to feed him directly. biting into the tangerine with a smile, prepared to say something. Suddenly, his face scrunched up, and he couldn’t speak for a long time.
The juice-exploding tangerine segments were sour and astringent, hard to swallow, as if he had eaten an entire lemon.
“So sour. Was this tangerine born from a lemon tree?”
The corners of Xie Shibai’s lips hooked up, seemingly in a good mood from the successful prank. He stuffed the rest of the tangerine into Lu Ciheng’s hand. “If you love it, you can have it all.”
Lu Ciheng’s face was a bit numb from the sourness. He realized what had happened and grabbed Xie Shibai, laughing muffledly. “Teacher Xie, tricking people?”
Xie Shibai said calmly, “I never said this tangerine was sweet.”
Lu Ciheng seized the opportunity to be shameless. “No, I’ve been soured. Teacher Xie, you have to be responsible.”
Xie Shibai replied casually, “Mn, definitely next time. Cover the lens, going to sleep.”
Lu Ciheng grinned brightly and scrambled to cover the lens. “Compensate me by letting me hug you to sleep today.”
After the livestream screen turned black, comments quietly popped up on the bullet screen.
[So Brother Xie ate it himself, found it super sour, didn’t say anything, and deliberately fed it to Dog Lu?] [So bad! I love it so much!] [He even smiled just now! The young couple is so sweet!] [Let me see who dares to say it’s a one-sided arrow from LCH again!] [Sweet to death ahhh!] [Sister upstairs, aren’t you the host of the solo stan super topic?] [Damn, forgot to switch accounts!] […Traitor!]
Translator’s note: What a dog!!! Hahaha. Puppy 2.0.
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