Chapter 08: A Kiss on the Palm, The Person in the Abyss
“You don’t need to do so much in the future, and you don’t need to come see me.” Hearing this, Shen Guanchao lowered his eyelashes and said indifferently.
From the night he decided to only be friends, he should have said this.
“Thank you.” Shen Guanchao handed the ointment back.
After a long while, Xie Jingchu reached out to take it.
His face was full of loss and helplessness, his chest heaving. In just an instant, tears fell straight down. “Why?”
“Because there are many things I don’t want to recall.” Shen Guanchao said as he made to walk out.
“I’m sorry.” A rush of hot blood surged to his brain, and Xie Jingchu grabbed Shen Guanchao’s hand directly.
He leaned down and, without waiting for an answer, kissed Shen Guanchao’s palm. The kiss was long. When his breath ran out, he rubbed his nose against the gaps between Shen Guanchao’s fingers, half intimately, half ingratiatingly.
“I’m sorry…”
The person in his palm murmured repeatedly.
This kiss landed softly on Shen Guanchao’s sensitive nerves. The face that was usually cold toward Xie Jingchu finally showed a crack. His heartbeat almost stopped, but he still had to pull away.
Building his defenses again, Shen Guanchao gently pushed Xie Jingchu’s lips away with his fingertips and turned to leave. “Go back to training.”
“…”
After Shen Guanchao left, Xie Jingchu lowered his eyes and looked at his retreating back, complex emotions intertwining.
A long time ago, Xie Jingchu had also watched his back like this… At that time, Shen Guanchao was prouder, more high-spirited, surrounded by stars like the moon, not yet polished by time.
In the first year of Shen Guanchao’s debut, when his glory was boundless, Xie Jingchu was fourteen and running away from home.
That time, he had walked to the North Street Park, more than ten kilometers away from home. Exhausted and disregarding his image, he squatted on the roadside lawn. His face was pale and listless, his upper limbs and cheeks covered in several bruises. His eyes were dead silent yet faintly misty.
Like a pool of stagnant water still hoping for salvation.
But hours passed, and his mother still hadn’t called him. She was probably still busy fighting heart-wrenchingly with his stepfather.
There had never been a moment of warmth in that home.
He lowered his head and slowly closed his eyes in resignation.
Before dark, the cold wind blew against the wrinkled hem of his clothes. Suddenly, a hand rested on his head and patted it teasingly.
“Hm?” Xie Jingchu froze for a moment and looked upāa strange boy with purple hair was looking down at him with drooping eyelids. His body leaned forward slightly, his eyes holding gentle kindness, yet he looked like a slacker.
“Kid, need help?”
The boy was very handsome and had appeared suddenly. Xie Jingchu stared at him blankly for a while before glaring and saying fiercely, “No need.”
In his impression, most people who dyed their hair and acted roguishly weren’t good peopleālike social youths or hooligans.
Just as he thought, the young Shen Guanchao had indeed done many reckless things: skipping class, racing cars, fighting, pulling all-nighters at internet cafes… But occasionally, he would show great kindness, helping an old lady cross the street now and then, sending lost brats home, or giving up his seat on the bus.
He helped with almost any trouble that could easily get him scammed.
His main vibe was: Moral character unknown, but heart is kind.
Seeing Xie Jingchu glare at him, he amusingly patted this scarred little boy again, retracted his hand, turned, and walked away.
Little Xie Jingchu: ?!
Teasing a dog?
Feeling he had been played, Xie Jingchu felt even more stifled. Having his head patted for no reason, he grabbed his own hair to vent his anger.
Until Shen Guanchao came back.
This strange “social youth” returned, now holding two bottles of Yunnan Baiyao and a bag of steamed buns. Seeing Xie Jingchu angrily rubbing his hair, he frowned in confusion but only chuckled lightly without asking much. He handed the things over. “Kid, for you.”
“Go home early.” His voice was gentle, like the boy next door in all TV dramas. “Parents will worry.”
A few seconds later, he added, “Did you run away from home?”
“It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me.”
“I… thank you…” Xie Jingchu blankly took the things handed to him, unable to react for a moment, not knowing what to say.
“The white bottle needs to be used with the red bottle to disperse the bruising. If you snuck out, go home quickly, understand?”
As Shen Guanchao gave instructions, the phone in his pocket suddenly rang. He glanced at the caller ID, answered calmly, and said, “Coming right away, tell the photographer to wait a bit longer.”
By the time little Xie Jingchu came back to his senses and looked up, he had already crossed the street, leaving only a blurry and distant back view.
That person carried a warmth and intensity he had never seen before, leaving a deep mark in his memory.
In Shen Guanchao’s world, home was beautiful.
In little Xie Jingchu’s world, home was gray.
This simple encounter established the tone of Xie Jingchu’s entire life thereafter.
One day later, he “saw” Shen Guanchao again on his way home from school. On the roadside LED screen, the endorsement advertisement of that “social youth” was playing on loop. He stood at the entrance of the mall, looking up in a daze, staring tightly at the youth in the white and gold uniform with long purple hair.
That was the first time he came into contact with the ID “NAVAĀ·Flesh“.
“The meaning of the ID ‘Flesh’ isā
“To shoulder suffering with a body of flesh and blood.”
So it was written on Shen Guanchao’s Baidu Baike page.
That was something he said during a post-match interview. after the interview aired, this sentence became a golden quote in the competitive circle overnight and the motto of countless people.
He shouldered suffering with a body of flesh and blood.
Such an amazing person had once come to save his dim self with a body full of light on that hot afternoon.
Xie Jingchu began a fanatical worship of the ID “Flesh” and began to touch “Plague Games.”
Countless nights soaked in tears, he treated that brief encounter as salvation.
Shen Guanchao didn’t know where Xie Jingchu’s scars came from, nor did he know why Xie Jingchu ran away from home.
The only thing he knew was that the little boy needed help.
He grew up with fine clothes and food, well-tutored. Under the guidance of his mother’s words and deeds, he could always empathize with everyone’s suffering.
He distinguished clearly between love and hate, but he was also soft-hearted and compassionate.
When Xie Jingchu landed that kiss, his heart instantly went into chaos.
But he couldn’t.
In front of the washbasin, Shen Guanchao’s breathing was rapid due to nervousness.
He splashed cold water fiercely onto his face, silently chanting the Three Character Classic in his mouth. “Be friends… be friends, ah f*ck…”
That kiss in the kitchen was like a depth charge suddenly thrown into calm amber. Lightning broke into the night, setting off a storm that couldn’t calm down for a long time.
He covered his heart with one hand and slowly sat down against the wall, trying to resist the violent beating.
He no longer had the confidence to repeat the same mistakes, yet his heart was still telling himā
You still love him.
Shen Guanchao took out a cigarette from his pocket with trembling hands, lit it, and smoked with a smile.
As the smoke flowed through his lungs, he was utterly decadent, yet that inexplicable love still couldn’t calm down.
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