Chapter 24: Robbery! Hand Over Your Paper Money and Incense…
“Finally, the end is in sight.” Jiang Si sent the draft video to Luo Yan and stretched lazily. He kicked off the ground, sending his swivel chair gliding across the floor, spinning a half-circle until he was facing Hai Di.
“Once I’m done with this video, I’ll have free hands to deal with your situation. I don’t even know where your home is; I can’t even summon your soul properly.” Jiang Si rested his elbow on the armrest, propping up his sharp chin, and said languidly, “But today, I’m taking you to see a master. Maybe someone out there has a solution.”
“You really want me to go back?” Hai Di’s face betrayed no emotion as he gazed deeply at him.
Jiang Si gave him a look that said what kind of nonsense are you asking, “Have you forgotten that you’re a living soul?”
“I haven’t.”
“Then what’s with that look?” Jiang Si narrowed his eyes. “Don’t tell me you’ve gotten addicted to the incense and candles here and gave up on trying to be human?”
Hai Di: “…”
Jiang Si wanted to pry further, but his phone rang. He swiped the screen and picked up.
It was Luo Yan. She started with a polite triple shock: “Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit!”
“This concept is incredible, Boss Jiang! You absolutely nailed it this time. Once this goes out, it’s going to go viral!”
“Let me see… this paper figure is so exquisite, and the movements are so fluid, it feels like CG animation. But it’s different… Oh, anyway, it’s just amazing. The camera work is top-tier, too. You really show your professional training.”
Jiang Si was rarely modest. “It’s alright. The special effects aren’t finished yet, so it’s not perfect. Check the content to see if there’s anything inappropriate. You need to gatekeep the publicity side of things.”
“No, no, it’s all good. I think it’s fantastic,” Luo Yan said with a smile. “By the way, remember to go check out the ritual assembly. I heard they invited a master from Ning City who is exceptionally powerful.”
“How powerful?”
“They say he’s consulted for quite a few big shots.” Luo Yan lowered her voice, “My colleagues gave me a crash course over the last two days. Three years ago, Xingzhou was suddenly hit by a massive torrential rain. Within two days, the whole city was flooded. Just as the casualty count was rising, this master and other practitioners arrived and held a massive ritual that finally stopped the rain. Legend has it that a giant dragon appeared that day, and many people saw it with their own eyes.”
“That impressive?” Jiang Si was startled. He had heard rumors about the rainstorm but didn’t know the details. He took the opportunity to glance at Hai Di and agreed, “Alright, I’ll go take a look today.”
Because it was the Ghost Festival (Zhongyuan) ritual assembly, the events took place during the day, from eight in the morning to six in the evening.
Jiang Si arrived a bit late, but the crowd hadn’t diminished in the slightest; it was bustling, with people rubbing shoulders.
As soon as he stepped into the Taoist temple, he smelled the thick scent of incense. Looking toward the incense burner on the central altar, he saw a meter-high thick incense stick curling smoke into the air.
He really didn’t like squeezing into crowds, so he picked a secluded path, tucking the doll possessed by Hai Di under his arm. When they reached a spot with few people, he whispered, “How do you feel?”
After all, this was a Taoist temple. Even if they were holding a ritual, ordinary ghosts and monsters couldn’t enter. Hai Di was a living soul, so Jiang Si didn’t know if the statues of the deities would suppress him.
“It’s fine,” Hai Di said, cherishing his words like gold.
“That’s good.” Jiang Si, unaware that Hai Di was internally sulking, felt relieved. He tucked him under his arm and walked openly past several Taoist priests in blue-purple robes.
Seeing that there was still an hour before the evening session, Jiang Si wandered around randomly. He had just turned into the Tai Sui Hall when he heard two girls with backpacks talking ahead of him.
“I don’t believe in Taoism; I’m a follower of [XX] religion.”
The other one said, “I don’t believe either; I’m a Youth League member.”
“Then can we enter the main hall? It feels inappropriate.”
“Look up.” The girl who called herself a League member pointed. Jiang Si looked up with them and saw a striking banner hanging in the main hall.
The girl read it out loud, articulating every word: “Persist in Freedom of Religious Belief.”
“…” Jiang Si fell silent and followed the two girls into the hall.
Looking up again at the imposing statue, he felt as if it was emitting a crimson glow, making the doll in his arms feel a bit hot to the touch.
Jiang Si’s family made paper effigies, so he dealt with ghosts and spirits often, but ultimately, he wasn’t religious. He felt it wasn’t right to offer incense, so he just cupped his fists in a gesture of respect. He walked around for a bit, letting time slip away.
When a gong sounded, he realized it was time for the evening session.
The final evening session followed the usual procedure: first offerings and incense, then chanting scriptures, and finally scattering rice for blessings.
The chime of the musical stone rang out rhythmically.
Jiang Si stood outside the railing, observing the people in various colored robes inside. He really didn’t know which one was the one he was looking for, so he asked the person next to him, “Do you know which master was invited from out of town?”
The person next to him was a devout believer, chanting along with the scriptures with cupped fists. In a gap between chants, hearing Jiang Si ask this, he said, “These are all masters from this temple. There are none from out of town.”
“?” Jiang Si was stunned. Wouldn’t an invited guest participate in the ritual?
He thanked the man and messaged Luo Yan to ask if she had a photo of the master.
Since the person he was looking for wasn’t there, Jiang Si simply left the main hall and found a quiet place to rest while waiting for Luo Yan’s reply.
Inside, the ritual was ongoing; outside, incense was being distributed. Wandering ghosts attracted by the scent came flocking in. An older ghost, possessing a bit more seniority, rolled his eyes, disdaining to fight over food with the lesser ghosts. He simply climbed over the wall into the Taoist temple, planning to steal some higher-quality incense.
Turning his head, he saw a young man sitting on a stone bench resting. Even from ten meters away, he could smell the sweet, delicious scent of incense and candles on him.
The old ghost subconsciously drooled so much his tongue fell out, saliva dripping tick-tock, his bruised eye sockets staring greedily at the target.
Smelling of incense and so young—he must be some useless little Taoist priest from the temple.
There wasn’t a ghost in sight over here. If he didn’t take the chance to rob him, he’d have to slap himself before going to sleep tonight.
Thinking this, he floated straight over. He deliberately put on a vicious face and spoke fiercely: “Hey! Robbery! Hand over all the incense and paper money you have!”
“…?” Jiang Si looked around and confirmed the ghost was talking to him.
“What are you looking at? I’m talking to you. Hand over the stuff, or don’t even think about leaving here today!” As the old ghost spoke, his tongue hung down to his chest, wiggling around like a hangman’s noose.
Truly an eye-opener. A ghost running into a Taoist temple to commit robbery. Jiang Si’s shock was indescribable; he even admired its courage a little.
“Hey? Did you hear me!” The old ghost saw the human staring at him and thought he was scared silly, stretching out his tongue to poke him.
Just as the tongue flicked out, Jiang Si grabbed it.
“Huh?” The old ghost was confused and pulled back hard, trying to retract his tongue.
Jiang Si didn’t give him the chance. With a few quick movements, he tied several knots, bundling that long tongue into a ball. Then, taking advantage of the moment the old ghost opened his mouth, he stuffed a handful of stones inside.
He let go and watched the old ghost struggle, trying to spit out the mouthful of stuffing. The stones mixed with the knotted tongue, stretching the corners of his mouth almost to his ears.
“Woo woo woo—” He glared hatefully at Jiang Si.
Jiang Si ignored him, looking disgustedly at his saliva-covered hands, and rushed to a tap a few steps away to wash them.
Too disgusting.
Why did he keep running into these things lately? First snakes, now a ghost dropping its tongue.
Couldn’t he meet a normal creature for once?
Looking back at the old ghost who was reaching into his mouth to untie the knots, Jiang Si felt it wasn’t enough and kicked him. “What a bold ghost, daring to rob someone here.”
The old ghost wanted to cry but had no tears. He did this every year; who knew that walking by the river so often would finally get his shoes wet?
Just as Jiang Si was wondering whether to throw it out, a voice suddenly came from behind: “Fellow Daoist, wait.”
Two men approached, one leading the other. The one in front was a middle-aged man in his thirties, wearing a gray-white Tang suit and holding a folding fan. Behind him was a younger man.
“Is there a problem?” Jiang Si raised an eyebrow.
“Today, the temple doesn’t restrict nearby spirits from entering, but ungrateful, malicious ghosts are not welcome. Go deal with it.”
The younger man dragged the old ghost away effortlessly. In a moment, only Jiang Si and the middle-aged man remained.
“Fellow Daoist is not from the temple, correct?” Shen Hu said, scanning Jiang Si before his gaze landed on his eyes. “Your eyes are somewhat unusual.”
“I’m not a Taoist priest.” Jiang Si explained the source of the incense smell on him. “My family is in the funeral business; you’ve misunderstood.”
“No wonder.” Shen Hu understood immediately and corrected himself smoothly. “Little friend’s actions just now were different from ordinary people. It turns out it’s a family tradition.”
Jiang Si took it as a compliment and smiled politely. “Master, are you a priest of this temple? I didn’t see you at the assembly just now.”
“I also came from outside.” Shen Hu tapped the palm of his left hand lightly with the fan in his right. “I just came out for a stroll; I didn’t expect to catch such a show. Little friend is truly brave.”
Someone who could catch a ghost with bare hands—Shen Hu had lived a long time and had only seen this one.
Hearing this, Jiang Si’s heart skipped a beat. “You came from Ning City?”
Shen Hu was surprised. “You know?”
“A friend mentioned a master from Ning City came, so I came specifically to visit. I didn’t expect such a coincidence.” Jiang Si beamed; it wasn’t a wasted trip after all.
He explained his purpose in a few words. “I have a friend whose soul has been detached. We’ve tried every method but can’t get him back. I came to the temple today to ask if there’s a solution to help him return to his body sooner.”
“Living soul separation?” Shen Hu’s expression turned grave, immediately thinking of the young master of the Hai family he had just seen in Ning City.
What was happening recently?
So many people losing their souls?
“Is that friend of yours here? I need to see the situation first.”
Jiang Si pointed to the doll playing dead in his arms. “It’s him.”
Shen Hu, seeing the doll: “…”
Truly a genius method.
If you can’t go back to the flesh, make another body.
“Little friend is not only agile but also exceptionally witty.” Shen Hu offered a dry compliment and reached out to Jiang Si. “May I take a look?”
“Of course.” Jiang Si handed the doll over. Shen Hu examined it carefully and found that, putting aside the trendy toy design, the doll was indeed ingeniously made.
The limb joints were made to rotate for easy movement, and because it was made of special resin, the ghost possessing it had most of its yin energy concealed.
“It is indeed excellent. Little friend has really provided me with a new line of thinking. How is this doll body made? Could you teach me?”
Jiang Si answered without thinking, “I customized it online. If you’re interested, I’ll send you the link.”
“…” Shen Hu was stunned for a moment, then couldn’t help but sigh. “I really didn’t expect masters to be hidden among the people.”
He mused that he should bring this up with the Celestial Masters Association when he got back, to see if this technology could be used for their usual magical tools.
Seeing him lost in thought, Jiang Si couldn’t help but urge, “Um, Master, we can talk about the doll later. Could you look at my friend first?”
“He’s been wandering outside and can’t even find his mother. It’s pitiful.”
Shen Hu was pulled back from his thoughts. He pinched a hand seal and chanted silently with his eyes closed.
But after chanting for a long time, the doll showed no reaction.
Shen Hu opened his eyes helplessly. “I’m really sorry. I don’t have much research in soul summoning. I can’t help your friend.”
Jiang Si was disappointed, but there was nothing he could do. He took the doll back. “Alright.”
Thinking for a moment, Shen Hu said, “It’s not good for a living soul to wander outside. If needed, you can bring the soul to the temple to be nurtured. As for returning to the body, perhaps the time hasn’t come. You can wait a while.”
Jiang Si thanked him for his kindness, added Shen Hu on WeChat, and asked, “Master, what is your surname? I’ll change the contact name.”
“Shen Hu. The ‘Hu’ from Man Chuang Hu (Fill the Bed with Tablets).”
Jiang Si paused in his typing, gave him another look, and praised, “That’s a great name.”
Sounded powerful and wealthy.
After sending the store link to Shen Hu, Jiang Si wanted to ask if there were other masters who could take a look, but the young man who had left earlier came running back quickly, looking panicked. “Master, something happened.”
Shen Hu remained calm and composed. “Speak slowly. What happened?”
The young man’s expression was complicated. “Two Willow Immortals have arrived.”
To be precise, two large white snakes.
Whoa!
This time, Jiang Si couldn’t be blamed for his shock. “Why would Willow Immortals come to the temple at this time?”
It was the Zhongyuan Ritual Assembly; these immortal families weren’t exactly the target demographic.
“I don’t know! Logically, if they were going anywhere, they should go to a Buddhist temple…” the young man muttered softly.
Logically? What logic? The Legend of the White Snake?
Jiang Si heard it clearly and suddenly felt that this group of professional mages wasn’t particularly reliable either.
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