Chapter 59: Take One More Step Towards Him, and He Is Yours
“Firstly, you have just ascended the throne and have already demoted the former Crown Prince to a commoner. If you were to kill the Empress Dowager as well, it would inevitably invite public censure.”
Qi Xiaojun analyzed the situation for Chu Lianmo in a gentle voice.
“Secondly, although Wen Yingying harmed Mother Empress…” Nowadays, Chu Lianmo’s mother and Wen Yingying were both referred to as Empress Dowager, and since Qi Xiaojun had been elevated to the status of a Co-Consort by Chu Lianmo, he could openly address her as “Mother Empress.” “But in truth, didn’t she help Mother Empress see Father’s true colors? Isn’t that, in a way, a good thing?”
“…You are right. Even without that incident, a heartless man will always be a heartless man. Seeing the truth sooner rather than later is a blessing.”
Having reached this conclusion, Chu Lianmo stripped Wen Yingying of her title as Empress Dowager on the grounds of harming imperial offspring and banished her to the Cold Palace.
Although this outcome was painful for Chu Ziqian, it was, at least, not the worst possible result.
Since then, Chu Ziqian had begun to eat properly every day, but apart from that, he remained in his room all day, neither speaking nor moving, still utterly despondent.
Jiang Yingnan rarely visited him. He had no desire to offer gentle words of comfort, yet he felt there was no point in going there just to mock and ridicule Chu Ziqian. He didn’t know how to untie the knot between them.
However, that afternoon, Jiang Ruobin went to the Jiang Residence to visit Chu Ziqian.
“What are you doing here?” Chu Ziqian sat in his chair, looking up at Jiang Ruobin with an unfriendly expression. Since his house arrest began, he had seen no one but Jiang Yingnan and the servants who delivered his meals. “Here to laugh at me? Or to show off your triumph?”
“What kind of talk is that?” Jiang Ruobin smiled and sat down opposite him. “What do I have to show off in front of you? In fact, I quite envy you.”
“…Envy me?” Chu Ziqian almost suspected he was speaking ironically. As he was now—stripped of everything—what was there to envy?
“To be honest, sometimes I don’t know what I lost to you.” Jiang Ruobin looked Chu Ziqian up and down. The man’s face was covered in a messy, unkempt beard from days of neglect. “Even though you are like this, he still thinks of you constantly, missing you.”
“…Are you… saying Ah Nan…?” Chu Ziqian’s heart, which had been dead calm for so long, suddenly gave a violent throb.
“When I chat with him about happy things, a trace of loneliness suddenly appears in his smile… Sometimes, he even zones out while speaking… Tell me, who else could he be thinking of but you?
“Perhaps you have lost the world, but you still possess his heart. I have no interest in the world, yet in this one regard, I simply cannot win against you.”
“…” Hearing these words, Chu Ziqian stared blankly at Jiang Ruobin, a mixture of five flavors churning in his heart.
“Chu Ziqian, you must understand that from beginning to end, it was you who wronged Ah Nan, not the other way around. You had long since lost the hearts of the people—from the officials of Chu to the commoners, to the people of Qi, few supported you. His so-called betrayal merely accelerated your inevitable downfall; you absolutely cannot blame everything on him.”
“I never blamed him,” Chu Ziqian said, lowering his head, his voice somewhat hoarse.
He had hated Chu Lianmo, hated Jiang Zhenxiong, and even hated Emperor Chu Wen, who had chosen to stand aside when he and Chu Lianmo were at war. But the only person he could not bear to hate was Jiang Yingnan.
“Since you don’t, what is the meaning of your lukewarm attitude towards him now? There are no longer any obstacles between you. If you take just one active step towards him, he is yours!”
“…You…” Chu Ziqian looked up at Jiang Ruobin with surprise and suspicion. “Why tell me all this?”
“Because I have admitted defeat.” The corners of Jiang Ruobin’s mouth lifted in an unusually bitter smile. “From the time you were the high-and-mighty Crown Prince to your fall as a commoner, I have tried for so long, yet I could never walk into his heart. I finally have to admit that perhaps you are the only one who can give him happiness. I don’t want to see him in pain anymore.”
“…” Although Jiang Ruobin kept saying he had admitted defeat, Chu Ziqian suddenly realized that in one aspect, Jiang Ruobin had truly and completely defeated him.
—In the aspect of devoting oneself wholeheartedly to Jiang Yingnan.
“Thank you.” In the end, Chu Ziqian said these two words sincerely to Jiang Ruobin.
“No need to thank me. Nothing I said today was for your sake.” Having said this, Jiang Ruobin turned and left the room, walking away without looking back.
Chu Ziqian sat in the room in a daze for a long while.
Finally, as if having made a firm resolution, he walked out of the room.
It seemed like a long time since he had seen the sun; even the mild light of the setting sun felt blinding. He instinctively raised a hand to shield his eyes.
But a person cannot hide away for a lifetime. Eventually, one must walk under the sunlight.
“Where are you going?” A guard of the Jiang Residence walked towards Chu Ziqian.
“What?” Chu Ziqian frowned. “Did your master order that I cannot leave the room?”
“…No.” The guard sighed inwardly. Truly the former Crown Prince; even now that he is nothing, he still possesses an imposing aura.
“Then, where is Ah Nan? Take me to him.”
Chu Ziqian was unfamiliar with everything in this new residence.
“Uh…” The guard hesitated slightly, but then nodded. “Follow me.”
Thus, the guard led Chu Ziqian to the door of Jiang Yingnan’s room.
At that moment, Jiang Yingnan was concentrating on painting.
Chu Ziqian recalled that in his memories, he often saw Jiang Yingnan painting, and he was often the subject of those paintings.
Only now, under Jiang Yingnan’s brush, there were only landscapes, flowers, and birds; the heroic young man was nowhere to be seen.
“Ah Nan…” Chu Ziqian called out softly.
The familiar voice caused the brush in Jiang Yingnan’s hand to tremble violently, leaving a large ink blotch on the paper.
“Who told you to come here?” Jiang Yingnan looked up, eyeing Chu Ziqian coldly.
“I’m sorry,” Chu Ziqian smiled at him dotingly. “I ruined your work. How about I paint another one to compensate you?”
This smile made Jiang Yingnan feel as if a lifetime had passed.
It was as if nothing had happened between them, as if there were no hurts or debts that could never be clearly settled.
But Jiang Yingnan was awake, after all. He knew they could not go back.
“Go back to your room. I don’t want to see you.”
“Ah Nan…” The rims of Chu Ziqian’s eyes reddened. “You once said that if I were not the Crown Prince, you would be with me… I am no longer the Crown Prince. You should fulfill your promise, shouldn’t you?”
The moment he heard these words, Jiang Yingnan’s eyes also became wet.
He hadn’t expected that, even now, Chu Ziqian would still want him.
But this thought made him feel incredibly cheap.
Perhaps Chu Ziqian was just in a good mood today. One day, he would surely remember that Jiang Yingnan was the one who had stabbed his dream of becoming Emperor in the back.
So Jiang Yingnan forced his heart to harden and said coldly, “Look at you, looking like a beggar. do you think you are still qualified to be with me?”
“…I will go back and tidy up my appearance right now. Or, Ah Nan, could you help me?”
After staring silently at Chu Ziqian for a moment, as if possessed by a ghost, Jiang Yingnan nodded.
He actually accompanied Chu Ziqian back to his room, meticulously shaving his beard and combing his hair, bit by bit.
In the mirror, it seemed the spirited, handsome young man of the past had returned.
“Ah Nan, you are so good!” Chu Ziqian suddenly couldn’t control himself and pulled Jiang Yingnan into his arms.
Jiang Yingnan finally couldn’t hold back the tears in his eyes; they fell, dampening Chu Ziqian’s lapel.
But after leaning in Chu Ziqian’s embrace for a moment, Jiang Yingnan steeled himself and pushed him away. “Let’s pretend we never knew each other before and try getting along anew.”
Only in this way could he know if Chu Ziqian was just momentarily confused by passion, or if he would suddenly go mad at him one day.
“Okay!” Chu Ziqian nodded happily. That Jiang Yingnan was willing to give him another chance was already the greatest comfort to him now.
But in the next instant, Chu Ziqian felt a sharp pain in the shoulder Jiang Yingnan had just pushed, and he instinctively reached out to rub it.
“What’s wrong?” Jiang Yingnan was surprised. Logically, the force he used just now shouldn’t have been enough to injure anyone.
Chu Ziqian gave a bitter smile. “Ever since Chu Lianmo abolished my martial arts, my body hurts here and there, and I feel weak and powerless.”
Only then did Jiang Yingnan realize he had been left with chronic ailments, and he couldn’t help but worry. “I’ll go ask an Imperial Physician to take a look at you… Which Imperial Physician do you think is best?”
Chu Ziqian smiled bitterly. “It would be good enough if any Imperial Physician is willing to see me now. Do I still have room to pick and choose?”
Jiang Yingnan pondered for a moment, then immediately ordered a servant to fetch Imperial Physician Ouyang.
Treating Chu Ziqian would certainly risk offending Chu Lianmo, but since Jiang Yingnan was currently a favorite in the court, Imperial Physician Ouyang, after some struggle, eventually agreed.
After taking Chu Ziqian’s pulse for a while, he said, “It is likely due to damage to the meridians throughout the body when the Emperor abolished his martial arts.”
Jiang Yingnan asked anxiously, “Can it be cured?”
“Damage to the meridians has no quick recovery method. It can only be nursed slowly. It might take a year or two, or even longer.”
“…Thank you, Imperial Physician Ouyang.”
After seeing off Imperial Physician Ouyang, Jiang Yingnan felt heavy-hearted.
He thought of asking Ji Hua to take a look, but felt Ji Hua would never agree to treat Chu Ziqian. Besides, based on his own medical knowledge, meridian damage was indeed quite troublesome; likely, any doctor would give a similar diagnosis.
“It’s alright, Ah Nan, don’t look so sour,” Chu Ziqian comforted him gently instead. “This is probably my retribution. When you were injured by the whip back then, it hurt just as much, didn’t it?”
Jiang Yingnan was startled. So Chu Ziqian still remembered that incident.
Chu Ziqian reached out and touched Jiang Yingnan’s face lovingly. “Actually, it wasn’t that I didn’t care about that incident. I was very heartbroken for you too… It was just that everything was going wrong for me at the time, and I really didn’t have the spare energy to help you, so I had to endure the heartache and ignore it… I’m sorry!”
“I don’t want to say I’ve forgiven you,” Jiang Yingnan smiled. “But my injury healed in a month or two at most, while you have to nurse yours for a year or two. You see, even if I don’t demand repayment for what you owe me, Heaven will help me make you pay it back tenfold.”
“Heh, it seems Heaven is quite fair.”
Jiang Yingnan changed the subject. “Ziqian, what plans do you have for the future?”
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