Chapter 41: Secretly, Secretly: I Need You, Tang Xingye.
Tang Xingye looked back. The Alpha possessed cold, sharp senses; his brows were as steep as mountain ridges, and he stood tall with one hand in his pocket. However, that icy demeanor was broken by a pink plastic stickâa lollipop wobbled gently with the movement of his chewing.
The funniest part was the SpongeBob SquarePants band-aid plastered on his forehead. The edges were smoothed down perfectly, and there was a faint smell of rubbing alcohol on him. Clearly, he had just come from the infirmary.
It was Ji Chen.
Tang Xingyeâs tense nerves relaxed a little, followed immediately by a wave of embarrassment.
Did this guy… just see me shaking my hand like an idiot?
Tang Xingyeâs gaze was irresistibly drawn to the grinning SpongeBob. It was likely a prank by the nurse in the infirmary; she had whispered complaints before about how Ji Chen sent bruised and battered Alphas to her clinic every other day.
He withdrew his gaze and asked preemptively, “Are you here to condemn me?”
Ji Chen walked up to him quickly, his tone playful. “Yeah. Have you thought about how youâre going to apologize?”
Hearing that teasing tone actually made Tang Xingye breathe a sigh of relief. “You said back then that I didn’t need to pay for damages.”
Ji Chen looked at the flush forced onto that cold, pale face by the pheromones. The thin skin at the corners of his eyes was tinged with red. Even though the person himself had no intention of pleasing anyone, he still exuded a fragility that provoked pity.
Ji Chen tossed a tube of ointment at him. “Not about that.”
Tang Xingye caught it. It was erythromycin ointment. So Ji Chen had seen it.
He rubbed the tube with his thumb, his feelings slightly complicated. Is this charity?
Tang Xingye knew clearly that it was his superfluous pride acting up. He accepted it, not refusing Ji Chen’s goodwill. If it hurts, it hurts; if he needs help, he needs help. Why treat someone else’s kindness as charity?
He knew the ointment wasn’t expensiveâto a rich person like Ji Chen, it didn’t even count as pocket change.
He got into a fight and got injured; Ji Chen spent money to buy him medicine. Ji Chen lost money, he gained medicine. If Ji Chen lost, then he won. So, he made a huge profit.
Tang Xingye was silent for a moment, then suddenly reached out. “The bandage on your wrist is loose. I’ll tie it for you.”
Ji Chen was a bit puzzled by the sudden show of concern but didn’t refuse, extending his wrist forward. “Thanks?”
His gaze fell on those long, slender hands. The skin was white, like a pile of snow dustâa whiteness that made one want to smear things onto it. The dexterous fingertips untied the bandage, a faint fragrance lingering in the breath between them.
The movements were fluid and beautiful to watch. No wonder those people liked staring at this Beta.
“I followed the pheromones here, thinking I could finally stretch my muscles…” Ji Chen watched Tang Xingye’s lowered eyelashes, which looked like small fans. “But you did great. You took care of those two wastes in a few moves.”
“If your hands are itching that much, just mock them for being trash who can’t even beat a Beta. Itâs guaranteed to work. I used this trick on arrogant Alphas before; itâs quite effective.”
Tang Xingye had beaten up quite a few Alphas using this entrapment method.
“I know.”
Tang Xingye paused his movements and looked up at him. “Hm? You know?”
Ji Chen lowered his eyes to look at him, revealing a hint of a sly smile. “I’ve used it too.”
They were standing very close. The Alpha’s breath brushed past his cheek. The cedar pheromones were faint, distinct from the discomfort usually caused by Alphas in their susceptible period.
Tang Xingyeâs eyelashes trembled twice as he stared intently at Ji Chen’s expression. “So, actually, you don’t feel pain?”
“Hm?”
“Because I’m currently poking a wood splinter into your knuckle, and you haven’t reacted at all.”
Ji Chen looked at his reddened knuckle for a moment, then let out an “Ah.” “It hurts.”
“Your acting is terrible,” Tang Xingye said.
Ji Chen sounded quite aggrieved. “What a vicious Beta. I bring you medicine, and you stab me.”
Tang Xingye accepted the “compliment” calmly. “It’s just a wood splinter; you won’t die. Youâve had worse injuries than this and I didn’t see you dying of pain.”
Ji Chen clicked his tongue and crunched the lollipop in his mouth. “Really ungrateful.”
“So, my guess is right?” Tang Xingye’s eyes were very bright right now, unlike his usual quiet and docile demeanor. His voice was pitched low, carrying the excitement of discovering a small secret. “Just admit it. I promise not to tell anyone. No third person will know.”
Iâll just write it in my diary. If Ji Chen upsets me one day, I’ll curse him to die of pain.
“Honestly,” Ji Chen smiled, not denying it. “Iâve been trying my best to act like a normal person, yet I get seen through by someone I don’t interact with much.”
Tang Xingye poked the splinter again. “You really can’t feel pain? Congenital?”
“Some issues with the nervous system after differentiation. It’s not completely painless.” Ji Chen didn’t explain much, nor did he stop the mischievous cat’s paw. He just watched his wound being artificially aggravated.
When the evil cat finally stopped moving, he withdrew his hand, took a candy from his pocket, methodically peeled the wrapper, and popped it into his mouth.
This meant Ji Chen relied on visual judgment to assess injuries during fights. Bruises, bleeding, abrasionsâevery treatment relied on memory. No wonder he handled even small wounds so perfectly.
Tang Xingye knew the topic stopped here; any further would be an invasion of privacy.
“What scent is on you? It smells pretty good.” Ji Chen’s nose twitched slightly as he asked somewhat hesitantly, a question he had wanted to ask for a while.
Between AO, praising pheromones as “smelling good” was almost equivalent to flirtingâan implicit way of saying “I want to eat you.” But Betas were like invisible people, drifting outside this system.
A dense, soft fragrance emanated from Tang Xingye. It wasn’t like an Omega’s pheromones, but at close range, its presence was extremely strong.
Tang Xingye lifted his wrist and sniffed. “No smell? If I had to say… sulfur soap?”
Ji Chen really knows his stuff. Iâll give him a bar when we get back.
“You suspect that Beta beat you into the hospital?” Gu Laoâs eyebrows shot up almost to his hairline, his voice full of disbelief. In his view, a Beta beating an Alpha was simply unheard of.
“Just a guess. No evidence.” Zhou Lin tapped the gold-stamped invitation lightly with his knuckles, his tone flat.
Regarding this matter, rather than the culprit, Zhou Lin was more interested in figuring out who the other Alpha was that aggravated his injuries.
Gu Lao narrowed his eyes, looking at the figure in the distance feeding the parrot.
Slender, thin, cold, and distant.
No matter how you looked at him, he didn’t look like a Beta who could beat up an Alpha. Instead, he looked like weak prey that was easily targeted.
“How do you plan to deal with him?” Gu Lao withdrew his gaze and licked his canine teeth.
Zhou Lin didn’t answer.
“To be honest, I suspect the disappearance of my precious flower is also related to him. Isn’t the forum saying he’s a jinx?” Gu Lao tilted his head to look at Zhou Lin, his tone carrying a deliberate frivolity. “Look, itâs coming true.”
Zhou Lin remained silent.
“We count as distant relatives, anyway. We share a common hated Beta. Speaking of which, my brother was also beaten into the hospital by him.” Gu Lao scrutinized Zhou Lin. The other’s slightly lowered, pitch-black eyes betrayed no emotion.
“His face isn’t bad. I don’t understand why those unlucky Alphas go soft on him.”
“Don’t be a busybody,” Zhou Lin stared at him, finally speaking.
“Why do I feel like you’re going soft too?” Gu Lao said.
Zhou Lin looked at him and flashed a standard, perfunctory smile.
Professor Ye’s office had a new residentâan Amazon parrot, entirely snow-white with tail feathers glowing with a pale golden luster. It was said to be a precious breed brought back specifically from South America by an overseas alumnus, named “Apollo.”
Tang Xingye had a new task: feeding this parrot.
“It’s not an ordinary bird,” Professor Ye said flatly as he added water to the trough. “It’s very intelligent. If you feed it too slowly, it gets in a bad mood and curses people. I’ve been correcting it for days, but it won’t change.”
Tang Xingye: “…”
He looked down at the parrot in the cage. The bird cocked its head to size him up, its black-bean eyes shining with scrutiny. After a while, Apollo suddenly cleared its throat and spoke in perfect articulationâ
“Good boy.”
Tang Xingye: “…”
Professor Ye pushed up his glasses. “I’m a bit busy lately. If you’re interested, you can teach it to speak. Maybe it can even teach you how to solve problems.”
“Tang Xingye, there are a few questions I don’t understand. Can I ask you to teach me?” An Alpha approached Tang Xingye, holding a workbook.
Tang Xingye: ? Who is this guy?
He was puzzled. Were they close? Why suddenly come to him for questions?
Tang Xingye tried to dig through his memory for this person’s information but found nothing. Probably just another ordinary classmate whose name he couldn’t remember.
He had been in the zone, and his train of thought was inexplicably interrupted. His social boundaries felt violated. Tang Xingye felt a bit annoyed inside, but he didn’t show it on his face. He took the book and glanced at it.
The Alpha knew Tang Xingye had no impression of him; he was just a passerby who had been in the same group once. Tang Xingye kept his distance from everyone. Any invitation unrelated to studying would be tactfully declined, and he basically never invited anyone anywhere.
âThis was good. Maintaining a suitable distance with everyone meant that no one was important.
Only those obscure formulas and precise algorithms were worthy of Tang Xingye’s focused gaze. The aloof Beta was just like that.
But the Alpha couldn’t stop his resentment.
He resented why Tang Xingye wouldn’t look at him more. He resented how he could remain so calm and composed.
Late at night, the Alpha would let his fantasies run wildâthe cold, distant Beta pressed beneath a passerby like him, unable to resist, stripped of all reserve and restraint. Reduced to a messy state, leaking at a touch, obediently sticking out his tongue for a kiss.
Eyes red, too weak to walk, trembling as he reached out for a hug.
But after daybreak, everything returned to square one. Tang Xingye still wouldn’t remember him.
He was close enough to clearly see the slender waist outlined by the shirtâa thin but flexible arc rising and falling slightly with his breathing. His throat suddenly felt terribly dry, and he swallowed unconsciously.
“You’ll understand if you look at this.” Tang Xingye interrupted him. His long fingers pushed the workbook back. His nails were trimmed round and clean, leaving a fleeting shadow on the page.
The Alpha’s gaze fell on the handwritingâSee Linear Algebra P213. His voice carried ingratiation and humility. “But I still don’t…”
“Sorry, I’m very busy right now.” Tang Xingye didn’t even look up, his voice as cold as ice. “If you really don’t understand, you can ask the teacher.”
The Alpha stood there, wanting to say something more, but Tang Xingye had already buried his head back in his own problems, radiating an aura of “Strangers Keep Away.”
The resentment of being ignored bubbled up again. Why ignore me? Why not look at me?
The window of the study room was half-open. The wind blew in wrapped in the scent of flowers. It should have been a refreshing cool breeze, but it only fanned the flames of the Alpha’s angry heat. He felt a vague, suppressed pressure rising, fantasizing about tearing off that calm, lofty mask and watching the Beta break down and lose control.
If he just looks once, he’ll understand how deep my desire is…
Tang Xingye suddenly looked up and glanced at him. “Do you have other business?”
That look was very cold, and very beautiful.
It sprayed out. The Alphaâs Adam’s apple rolled violently. He stared straight at Tang Xingye’s face, his hands trembling as he picked up the workbook, speaking somewhat incoherently, “No, thanks, thank you…”
Just then, Tang Xingye glimpsed another figure appearing at the classroom door out of the corner of his eye. He frowned in annoyance. Why are so many people looking for me today?
Fortunately, the newcomer was tactful. He simply sat quietly opposite him, opened his materials, and started self-study. Pei Lian always knew how to read the room; having witnessed the scene of Tang Xingye rejecting someone, he naturally wouldn’t bore him.
The pen tip scratched across the paper until Tang Xingye closed his competition problem set and looked up at the person opposite. “Did you figure it out?”
The sudden question startled Pei Lian. “Hm?”
“Or did you deliberately write the wrong steps again?” Tang Xingye capped his pen and tapped the desktop lightly.
This remark tightened Pei Lian’s heart. He should have known he couldn’t hide it from Tang Xingye’s eyes. Those elementary mistakes made on purpose were nothing but clumsy probes.
Should I explain?
“No.” Pei Lian curled his fingertips, his nail scratching a shallow mark on the scratch paper. “It was my fault for not writing seriously at the start.”
Tang Xingye frowned slightly. He didn’t like Pei Lian acting like thisâknowing the answer but not writing it properly, solving problems perfunctorily.
This subtle change in expression made Pei Lian’s heart sink abruptly. He suddenly regretted his honesty just now. Once started, it happens again; he thought Tang Xingye would tacitly allow his little tricks, just like he tacitly allowed those “accidental” touches.
But this time, Tang Xingye’s gaze was like a deity’s pity, yet also like a scrutiny, as if pondering whether this unfaithful believer was still worthy of such indulgence.
Pei Lian’s voice was so light it sounded like a defense, or perhaps a mumble to himself. “…It was only those few days.”
Tang Xingye looked at him, his expression unchanged.
“Didn’t you have a question to ask me just now?” Tang Xingye’s voice remained flat, devoid of emotion.
“No, I know how to do it now.” Pei Lian lowered his head, like a puppy leashed by its owner, wanting to break free yet coveting the owner’s touch.
Tang Xingye was silent for a moment, then spoke. “Say it, so I know what you’re thinking.”
“I don’t know how to write it.”
“Why didn’t you say so just now?”
“I thought you didn’t have time.” Pei Lian remembered the Alpha who was rejected moments ago, his knuckles unconsciously rubbing the corner of the page.
“That was for others.”
Tang Xingye closed his own problem set, got up, and walked behind Pei Lian. He propped his hands on the desk, a posture that half-enveloped Pei Lian, and looked down at his book.
“Good boy,” Tang Xingye leaned down, his hair falling forward. His voice brushed past Pei Lian’s ear like a feather. “Do you need help?”
Pei Lian’s mind went blank.
He looked up, bewitched. Is Tang Xingye holding me?
Tang Xingye suddenly remembered Apollo’s articulate tone. Seeing Pei Lian’s stunned expression, he inexplicably found it funny. His eyes were dyed with a hint of laughter, seeming proud of successfully teasing someone.
Pei Lian blinked. Their faces were almost touching. He could clearly see his own reflection in the light-colored pupils, and the small shadow cast by those slightly trembling eyelashes.
Pei Lian was always good at saying things that made people happy for a short while. In social interactions, making others moderately pleased would yield more benefits.
Tang Xingye wanted to hear words about being needed. Pei Lian didn’t mind saying them to him.
“I need you, Tang Xingye.”
This sentence wasn’t pretty social rhetoric, nor was it deliberate flattery. It was from the heart, the most instinctual craving.
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