You Claimed You Didn’t Love Me, So Why Cry Now That I’m Engaged? Chapter 175

Chapter 175: Big Brother is So Cute

“Miaomiao, what are you saying?”

The room was pitch black. Gu Huaiye couldn’t see Xie Miaohan’s expression clearly, but a feeling of panic rose in his heart; he felt deeply unsettled.

However, his hands were tightly gripped by Xie Miaohan and pinned above his head. He couldn’t move at all.

“Good Miaomiao, let me go first.” Gu Huaiye softened his tone, trying to soothe the other’s emotions. “Whatever it is, let’s talk after turning on the light.”

But somehow, Gu Huaiye’s comfort didn’t succeed; instead, it enraged Xie Miaohan.

Xie Miaohan suddenly lowered his head and bit down hard on Gu Huaiye’s shoulder.

“Hiss.”

Gu Huaiye sucked in a cold breath, his body shuddering from the pain.

Before he could say anything, Xie Miaohan started crying first, licking the wound with remorse and heartache.

Gu Huaiye felt a wet patch on his collarbone, presumably from Xie Miaohan’s falling tears.

“I’m sorry…” Xie Miaohan’s voice carried a distinct sob. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. Brother is always mean to me. You treat me well only because of him, right? I heard everything.”

“If you didn’t have the memories with him, would you never have come to save me? Would you never have taken me away from the filthy District H?”

Gu Huaiye listened in confusion, taking a long time to react.

Is this a split personality?

That’s not right. Xie Miaohan had already integrated those memories; he shouldn’t be splitting into another personality.

Could it be that he is extremely unwilling to admit those memories, but since they are real and impossible to escape, he was forced to divide into two people?

Gu Huaiye really wanted to consult a psychologist, but this situation involved rebirth and transmigration—there was no way to consult anyone.

“Miaomiao…”

“Don’t call me that.” Xie Miaohan cried. “I am not the Miaomiao you want…”

Gu Huaiye pressed his lips together and corrected himself. “Then how about I call you Xiaohan?”

Xie Miaohan didn’t answer, which counted as tacit agreement.

“Xiaohan, can you let me go first?” Gu Huaiye coaxed him gently. “My arms are sore and painful with you holding me like this.”

After he spoke, Xie Miaohan let go of his wrists, but his body remained pressed on top of Gu Huaiye, so Gu Huaiye still couldn’t turn on the light.

Gu Huaiye had to comfort him in the darkness.

“You and Miaomiao are the same person. You are both equally important to me.” Gu Huaiye said, “I said it before: without Miaomiao, I wouldn’t have actively taken care of you. Without you, I wouldn’t have been able to realize my own feelings.”

“You only love him.” Xie Miaohan emphasized heavily. “You wish I would disappear so the person you love can return to normal.”

“I don’t think that way,” Gu Huaiye quickly explained. “My memories with you are just as important. I never thought about making those memories disappear. And I don’t feel that taking care of you is hard work. I was indeed sick, but I don’t regret it. As long as you live well, I am willing to give everything.”

Xie Miaohan buried his head in Gu Huaiye’s chest like an anxious, helpless small animal, clinging tightly to him, absorbing his warmth.

“Brother, you are always abandoning me. No matter how I beg you, you aren’t willing to stay for me.” Xie Miaohan cried. “Are you treating me as a substitute? Every time you stroke his photo, what are you thinking about?”

Just as Gu Huaiye uttered a syllable, Xie Miaohan hurriedly interrupted him.

“If you really treat me as a substitute, why won’t you be intimate with me? As long as you nod, I’m willing to take off my clothes immediately. Even being his substitute is fine. Is it because I’m not worthy?”

“No, Miao…” Gu Huaiye paused and quickly corrected himself. “Xiaohan, I didn’t recognize my feelings back then. I thought two Alphas wouldn’t have a result, and I was old and poor at that time. I really didn’t want to hold you back, so I kept pushing you away.”

Gu Huaiye lowered his head and kissed the top of Xie Miaohan’s hair.

“Xiaohan, you are Miaomiao. To me, you are the same person; it has nothing to do with being a substitute.” Gu Huaiye said, “Even if you didn’t have Miaomiao’s memories at that time, I still felt you were Miaomiao. I never treated you as two separate people.”

Xie Miaohan’s mood improved slightly. “Brother, then you won’t leave me, right?”

“I won’t.”

“Do you love me, or do you love him more?”

Gu Huaiye: “……”

He didn’t expect to encounter this kind of eternal dilemma, similar to “who would you save if your mother and wife fell into the water.”

“To the same degree.” Gu Huaiye had to answer with a ‘scum’ attitude.

He wasn’t sure if this was a split personality or if Xie Miaohan was using the name “Xiaohan” to test his attitude toward those memories.

Regardless, he couldn’t offend either of them.

Fortunately, Xie Miaohan didn’t seize on this point to throw a fit. He just rubbed his cheek against Gu Huaiye’s neck.

“Brother, actually, I was the one who knew you earliest.”

“What?” Gu Huaiye asked in confusion.

Xie Miaohan chuckled softly and didn’t answer.

After a while, Xie Miaohan became anxious again.

“Brother, I did many things to wrong you. Will you really forgive me?”

Gu Huaiye thought he was referring to the disfigurement and joining the army, so he coaxed softly, “Yes, no matter what you do, I will forgive you.”

Xie Miaohan fell into silence.

A few minutes later, Gu Huaiye felt sleepy again and couldn’t help yawning.

He began to drift off, his breathing gradually becoming steady and heavy.

Suddenly, Xie Miaohan kissed him again, biting his lip neither lightly nor heavily. Once again, he kissed Gu Huaiye awake.

Having just bitten Gu Huaiye’s shoulder, there was still a faint taste of iron between his lips and teeth.

This kiss wasn’t gentle; it was even a bit domineering, giving Gu Huaiye no chance to refuse.

Only when Gu Huaiye made “mmph” sounds again did Xie Miaohan agree to let go of his lips.

But the kisses moved to his neck and chest, and his hands unhurriedly undid the buttons on Gu Huaiye’s pajamas.

Gu Huaiye: “……”

Alright, don’t even think about sleeping tonight.

“Miaomiao, wait a moment.”

Xie Miaohan bit his collarbone hard. “I am Xiaohan.”

Gu Huaiye had to correct himself. “Xiaohan, I’m really sleepy. Can we do this tomorrow?”

“No.” Xie Miaohan’s tone became dejected. “Brother, do you hate me very much? Do you hope I disappear tomorrow?”

Gu Huaiye was out of options.

It was his own wife; he could only indulge him without limits.

“Come on then.” Gu Huaiye actively took off his clothes, putting on an expression like he was facing death. “Don’t stop until dawn.”

Xie Miaohan laughed. “Brother is so cute.”

Author’s Note:

In case anyone gets confused, let me explain here.

Gu Huaiye and Xie Miaohan’s meeting in university was not their first lifetime together; the one where he transmigrated was.

Xie Miaohan and the Gu Huaiye without memories also had some history, which caused Xie Miaohan, as the memories gradually merged, to resist that specific period of memory intensely. This story will likely be written in the extras. Friendly reminder: it will be a little bit angsty.

There is no split personality. It is just that the influx of strange memories confused Xie Miaohan greatly, triggering a defense mechanism where he treats those memories as another person.

But the memories really happened, so he gets jealous of himself and forces Gu Huaiye to say which one he loves more.

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