Chapter 78: Don’t Cry, I Can’t Forgive Him
Beneath the fireworks, Shen Xingyu leaned down and gently took Liang Sheng’s hand, placing a meticulously prepared gift box into it. His eyes, which were usually cold, were now filled only with seriousness and sincerity:
“I kept thinking about what to send—cars, houses, gold. But then I felt that you wouldn’t care for those material things. I made this music box myself; inside are my most precious things.”
Liang Sheng looked at his expectant appearance, then lowered his eyes to the beautifully wrapped gift in his hand and laughed mockingly:
“What makes you think I don’t care for those material things?”
“I know you didn’t marry me for those.” Shen Xingyu’s gaze was bright and certain.
In Liang Sheng’s eyes, this kind of confidence was merely self-conceit. He frowned ironically and asked in return:
“Then for what? For your sincerity?”
“I…” Shen Xingyu was suddenly speechless.
This Liang Sheng made him feel like a stranger.
The Liang Sheng of the past would never have been so sharp-tongued, nor would he have looked upon his gift with such disdain.
Sadness, panic, and disappointment…
He hadn’t expected that he too would one day experience the emotions Liang Sheng had felt for all these years—it was so hard to bear.
“What if I am just after your money?”
Liang Sheng dismissively weighed the item in his hand.
He forced himself to pretend not to care, treating the man the same way the man had once treated him with contempt.
“Then I’ll give it to you.”
Shen Xingyu didn’t hesitate, looking at Liang Sheng anxiously. He would give anything, as long as the other didn’t leave.
Hearing this, Liang Sheng was stunned for a moment. That forced indifference was starting to crumble.
“I was a fool before, loving you with all my heart and soul, hoping for your sincerity in return. But what happened?”
He let out a heavy sigh, nearly crying again. He looked up stubbornly at the man, his eyes full of resentment:
“All I got in return was your limitless humiliation.”
As he finished speaking, the fireworks stopped.
The brilliant firelight turned into ash.
Shen Xingyu’s heart also shattered into pieces.
What he feared most was Liang Sheng hating him, yet he was the one who had personally destroyed that happiness.
He wanted to say that it was because he loved too much, that he was always insecure and afraid Liang Sheng would leave him one day, which drove him mad with all those tests.
However, he couldn’t say it.
He was never one for expressing himself.
Those past sweet words of false affection were merely a performance to win Liang Sheng’s favor.
True feelings had been buried deep in his heart for so long, covered by piles of snow, that even he himself couldn’t find a single trace to speak of.
Love spoken so casually was merely his sickly affectation.
Shen Xingyu stared at him for a long time. Liang Sheng saw himself in those deep eyes and saw the other look like a trapped beast—helpless, lost, and in painful struggle. It seemed the man was showing weakness, but found it difficult to speak.
He suddenly couldn’t control his urge to soften his heart, but as soon as he thought of this man heartlessly burning the last photo of his mother, and what he had done before, and the irreparable damage he had caused, his heart was filled with hatred once more.
“I can’t accept such a gift, nor do I care for it.”
Liang Sheng angrily shoved the gift back into the man’s arms and turned toward the cabin. The moment he turned, his eyes grew red.
Don’t cry. I can’t forgive him.
“Sheng-sheng! Ugh…”
Shen Xingyu wanted to chase after him, but perhaps because he had been in the wind for too long, combined with his constant suppression of his fear of the deep sea, his heart suddenly throbbed with pain. He hurriedly grabbed the railing, his spine arching over.
Sweat began to break out on his forehead.
His fingers gripping his chest were trembling with force.
Liang Sheng had clearly heard that groan of pain, but instinctively felt the man was just acting piteous and didn’t want to pay him any attention.
He hadn’t walked more than a few steps before a heavy thud sounded behind him; something had crashed onto the deck.
Liang Sheng’s heart skipped a beat. He still couldn’t help but turn back, only to see Shen Xingyu lying straight on the ground.
What… was wrong with him?
He was panicked. No matter how much he hated this man, he couldn’t witness the husband he had lived with for seven years have something happen to him. He was terrified and ran back.
“What’s wrong with you?”
Liang Sheng asked anxiously, immediately seeing that Shen Xingyu was clutching his chest, his face completely pale.
“Does your heart hurt?!”
He asked, then felt he was truly foolish—every time Shen Xingyu’s heart hurt, he looked exactly like this.
“Where is your medicine?! Where is the medicine…”
Liang Sheng frantically searched the man’s pockets.
Back when he still loved Shen Xingyu, he always carried fast-acting heart-saver pills. Later, having been hurt to the point of utter disappointment, he had also stubbornly decided not to care about him anymore.
If he couldn’t find the medicine and had to watch Shen Xingyu die right in front of him, he would probably blame himself for a lifetime.
Shen Xingyu was already too pained to speak.
Fortunately, the medicine was quickly found in his jacket pocket. Liang Sheng hurriedly poured out several pills, his hands shaking violently, and fed them into the man’s mouth.
The medicine was very bitter. Shen Xingyu instinctively wanted to spit it out, but Liang Sheng wouldn’t let him, using his hand to block his mouth.
“Eat them… do you want to die?”
Liang Sheng choked out, his eyes moist.
Shen Xingyu was still conscious. Hearing his words, he could only frown and swallow the pills.
Seeing him take them, Liang Sheng felt a weight lifted, and then he reached out to help him up.
The man was heavy. He used a lot of strength to pull the man into a sitting position, his small face turning red from the effort.
He couldn’t understand why such a strong-bodied man like Shen Xingyu would happen to have a heart condition.
Moreover, Shen Xingyu had great self-esteem and was unwilling to let outsiders know he was sick. Before every exercise, he would take a shot of medication to maintain a normal heartbeat.
Shen Xingyu gradually calmed down.
He took several deep breaths, leaning his head against the railing. When he felt his heart finally stop hurting, he slowly opened his eyes.
“Are you better? Do we need to go to the hospital?”
Liang Sheng instinctively worried about him.
Seeing his eyes full of concern, the heart that had been tormented for so many days finally felt a bit better. Shen Xingyu let out a difficult smile: “Sheng-sheng still has me in his heart. Even if I die right now, it would be worth it.”
Being called out, Liang Sheng was embarrassed and stubbornly replied:
“I… I don’t! I was just afraid that since there’s no one else here, if you suddenly died, I would have to go to prison!”
Shen Xingyu saw through his duplicity, feeling secretly delighted, but he still had to pretend to be weak as he reached out his hand:
“Sheng-sheng, I can’t get up. Give me a hand…”
“No, I’m sure you’re fine now.”
Liang Sheng huffily turned his head away.
“Ugh… it hurts…”
Shen Xingyu began to theatrically clutch his chest again, looking at him piteously, hoping the other would take pity on him.
“Is it really hurting, or are you faking?”
Liang Sheng crossed his arms and studied him.
“It really hurts…”
Shen Xingyu’s tears were almost coming out; his acting was truly flawless. Liang Sheng hesitated but ultimately believed him.
“Fine. For Grandfather’s sake, I’ll… I’ll help you this once. I won’t care about you again! Burning my photo—you deserve the pain…!”
His small mouth didn’t stop chattering, still angry about the photo, but his hand proactively went to support the man.
Shen Xingyu draped his arm over his little wife’s shoulder, while also picking up the discarded gift from the deck.
The other was so small that he could easily pull him into his embrace. The other’s body was also fragrant and soft, making him unable to resist leaning in to sniff at the other’s neck.
Liang Sheng felt his neck was very itchy. He turned and saw the man right next to him was smiling, and he immediately realized he was being secretly taken advantage of. His face turned red instantly.
“What are you doing…! Disgusting!”
In his anger, he delivered a hard elbow to the other’s chest.
Coincidentally, it hit the very heart that had just recovered.
“Ah! Sheng-sheng, you’re so cruel…”
Shen Xingyu let out a pained groan, his brow tightly knit.
Liang Sheng didn’t know how he had used so much strength and was very much at a loss: “…Are you okay?”
“No… I’m not okay. It hurts so much!”
Shen Xingyu immediately changed his tune, theatrically clutching his chest and acting pained, moaning as he put on a show.
Liang Sheng also lost his composure, believing it to be true.
“Hurry into the cabin.”
He quickly helped the man lie on the bed and turned to pour warm water. Although he still resented Shen Xingyu in his heart, he couldn’t just ignore him; he considered it a debt he owed the man.
“Drink some water, rest up, and then drive the boat back to the dock. Don’t let something actually happen.”
He murmured as he handed the water cup over, his eyes awkwardly looking elsewhere, his heart feeling very conflicted.
Shen Xingyu lowered his eyes, looking at the water but not drinking. An unreadable smile touched the corners of his mouth, and his eyes beneath his hair arched slightly.
The next second, he suddenly yanked the unsuspecting Liang Sheng over.
Liang Sheng let out a cry of surprise. The cup fell to the floor with a clank, and the water spilled out, winding across the ground.
Caught off guard, he fell into the man’s arms.
Shen Xingyu rolled over, pinning him beneath him.
Liang Sheng was stunned. When he snapped back to his senses, he hurriedly struggled: “What… what are you doing?! Let me go! Didn’t you say your heart hurt? You were lying to me!”
“I wasn’t lying to you.” Shen Xingyu spoke seriously.
“Fine! I was so worried about you just now! And you lied to me again? I’m really angry now!”
Liang Sheng glared at him, regretting that he had been so easily deceived by the other’s words once again!
“This place truly hurts.”
Shen Xingyu’s eyes were red, and his eyelids drooped.
He carefully took Liang Sheng’s hand and placed it on his chest, looking at him as he spoke every word with emphasis:
“Every time you say harsh things to me, ignore me, or hit me, this place hurts with you.”
Liang Sheng was stunned. His sorrowful eyes were like a fog in Berlin—misty, desolate, and drizzling with light rain.
It made it impossible to tell if it was true emotion or false pretense.
But one couldn’t help but feel pity and heartache.
Yet the heartache was quickly suppressed.
Liang Sheng knew he absolutely could not be deceived by the other’s appearance again!
Shen Xingyu was just a liar!
He angrily pulled his hand back and turned his face away:
“You deserve it…”
Shen Xingyu gently raised his hand to cradle the other’s face:
“Sheng-sheng, look at me. Don’t be like this anymore, okay? Let’s… start over, okay?”
“No!”
Liang Sheng’s answer was absolute and decisive.
“Get off me! I don’t want to do anything with you! Go away! I hate you!”
He struggled with all his might, hitting the man’s shoulder.
“Look, you’re doing it again.”
Shen Xingyu’s voice was low. Suddenly, he buried his face in the hollow of Liang Sheng’s neck, speaking muffledly:
“I’m not doing anything to you. I just want to hold you.”
Liang Sheng tried to twist his body, but he still couldn’t get up. The man’s breath was puffing against his neck.
It was itchy and numbing.
His body instinctively grew stiff.
He was both fearful and resistant.
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