Chapter 60: Let’s Get a Divorce
Seeing that Liang Sheng had finally woken up, Shen Xingyu immediately returned to the bedside, leaning over to look at him, his eyes filled with surprise:
“Shengsheng, do you feel unwell anywhere? The doctors are all here; you can tell them.”
Liang Sheng slowly moved his gaze, seeing the doctors and nurses gathered around, and the worried man.
He hadn’t yet escaped from the nightmare of the deserted island. Seeing the culprit, Shen Xingyu, standing before him as if nothing were wrong, he felt a sudden surge of resentment. His eyes reddened, and he turned his head away, not wanting to look at him.
Shen Xingyu was stunned. Knowing he was still angry about the island, he could only ignore it for now and turned to talk to the doctors for a moment.
After the doctors left, Shen Xingyu closed the door. He instinctively lightened his footsteps, walking carefully toward Liang Sheng. For some reason, he began to feel nervous, somewhat afraid to face him.
While Liang Sheng was unconscious, he could say he was sorry, but now he couldn’t utter a single word of apology.
If he said it, it would feel awkward. After all, what’s done is done; he never regretted what he did.
Liang Sheng knew he was behind him but didn’t know he felt guilty. He only thought the man was going to use some cruel method to torture him again while he was weak. Terrified, he pulled the blanket tight, trembling uncontrollably.
He’s shaking so much… is it because of the pain?
Thinking this, Shen Xingyu grew more worried. He walked to the other side, lifted the blanket, and said urgently: “Shengsheng, what’s wrong?!”
Realizing he was acting too emotional—and being poor at showing affection—he coughed awkwardly and asked in a low voice: “Are you… feeling unwell?”
Liang Sheng turned to lie on his other side, not wanting to talk to him at all. Hearing him speak made his whole body feel uncomfortable.
Shen Xingyu’s fingers tightened at his side, his gaze helpless as he looked at the person huddled in a ball. After a long silence, he finally said: “Don’t be like this. It was my fault. I shouldn’t have left you on that island.”
Actually, he just wanted to hide Liang Sheng away to avoid the reporters and rumors. Though the island was desolate, there was no danger. Liang Sheng could have spent a few free days there. But explaining it that way felt too sentimental; he couldn’t say it.
However, it was indeed his fault. He was too selfish and too obsessed with Liang Sheng’s love and dependence.
That’s why he used such a vile method to torture Liang Sheng into this state. Now that he had calmed down, he felt it was truly uncalled for.
But the words he had carefully weighed fell into Liang Sheng’s ears as nothing more than the same superficial excuses as always.
Does he still think I’ll just give him a graceful way out?
Impossible.
Liang Sheng gripped the bedsheets with hatred under the covers, tears flowing. He bit his lip, crying silently and with a deep sense of grievance.
The air suddenly became oppressively quiet.
Shen Xingyu tried to find a topic of conversation. But he wasn’t a talkative person, and after standing there helplessly for a while, he said awkwardly:
“Shengsheng, are you hungry? I’ll have the kitchen cook a bowl of porridge. The doctor said you can eat something in an hour. By the time the porridge is done, it will be just about right.”
Liang Sheng still refused to acknowledge him.
Shen Xingyu didn’t dare force him anymore. If he didn’t want to talk, fine. He had crossed the line, so it was only right that he endured Liang Sheng’s rare display of temper.
Shen Xingyu comforted himself with a few words, and as he turned to leave, he suddenly heard a faint, hoarse voice from behind:
“Shen Xingyu, let’s… get a divorce.”
There was a pause in the middle—a pause followed by a more determined surrender.
Liang Sheng didn’t know how he had said it. It felt like he had been thinking about it for a long time, yet also as if he had just suddenly come to his senses.
Perhaps from the moment Shen Xingyu “lost his memory,” this person was no longer his former lover; he didn’t belong to him anymore.
He had been too persistent, wanting the other to remember the times when they loved each other most even if it meant being battered and bruised. But some things had long since changed. Whether it was love or mutual loathing, it was time to let go.
Shen Xingyu’s head buzzed. He didn’t quite hear it clearly, or rather, he couldn’t believe his ears. He turned around to see Liang Sheng had already sat up, looking directly at him with red eyes and a resolute gaze.
He was covered in bruises, with many places wrapped in bandages—injuries from the time on the deserted island.
“What did you… just say?”
Shen Xingyu’s Adam’s apple bobbed. He was suddenly nervous.
This time, Liang Sheng no longer feared the coldness and cruelty in those eyes. He sniffled, choked up, and repeated firmly: “I said, let’s get a divorce. I’ll give you your freedom, and you… let me go too.”
The word “divorce” was like a landmine, exploding in Shen Xingyu’s restricted zone. He instantly turned red-eyed, took two steps to Liang Sheng, grabbed his wrist, and denied it in a frantic, self-deceiving way:
“Shengsheng, you’re lying to me, right? You’re angry with me, so you’re using these words to upset me. I know. It’s okay. No matter how angry you are, you can hit me or scold me, I don’t care… just don’t… don’t make this kind of joke, okay? I don’t want to hear it…”
Seeing his urgent and pleading look, Liang Sheng gave a cold laugh and pulled his hand back forcefully. “You don’t want to hear it? All these years, I’ve remembered everything you disliked and every word you didn’t want to hear. I didn’t dare do them because I was afraid you’d hate me. I’ve always been submissive, following your lead…”
As he spoke, the tears swirling in his eyes fell, shattering on his chest.
“But what about you?”
Shen Xingyu frowned, his heart aching along with the other’s sobbing. Those tearful eyes left him speechless. He never thought that Liang Sheng would be the first one to ask for a divorce.
Liang Sheng wiped his face and continued to recount the hardships of these years: “No matter how humbly I tried to please you or how careful I was, you still had that look of extreme loathing. All you ever gave me was coldness…”
Shen Xingyu’s eyes flickered with panic. He wanted to explain. The coldness was just to test if he would leave. He was just afraid that if he were too good to Liang Sheng, the other would take it for granted and get bored of him…
But those words reached his throat and were forced back down. He couldn’t say them.
It was too melodramatic.
“In the beginning, I just thought you had a change in personality due to the car accident. It was fine; I understood. I felt guilty too; if it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be like that. So I accommodated you in every way, wanting to make up for it and wanting you to remember the ‘us’ from before…”
Liang Sheng’s eyes were full of disappointment and pain. After a long pause, he forced himself to continue: “But what happened? I worked hard for so many years, only to see you being gentle to Su Nian, to see you using the way you used to love me to love him. Only then did I suddenly understand—you really don’t love me anymore…”
“No!”
Shen Xingyu finally spoke up to protest. He grabbed Liang Sheng’s shoulders, suddenly incoherent: “I do! I love you! My feelings for Su Nian… they were just… just…”
He felt like something was stuck in his throat. His affection suddenly dimmed. He was used to acting and deceiving, and now that he suddenly had to show his heart, he was somewhat at a loss. Was it love? He didn’t know.
“Just what? Just an act? Heh… do you think I’ll still believe you now?”
Liang Sheng shook off his touch. All the pain accumulated deep in his heart over the years, along with his despair for this relationship, completely erupted:
“Hurry up and divorce me. I don’t love you anymore. You’re the same anyway. It’s perfect; I’ll fulfill your wish. I’ll fulfill the wishes of you and your lover. Don’t come here to disgust me anymore. I’ve truly had enough!”
Though he spoke hurtful words, Liang Sheng’s tears wouldn’t stop. He bit his lip hard, looking extremely aggrieved.
This was the first time he had hurt Shen Xingyu, and it would be the last. He didn’t want to keep hoping for a happiness he couldn’t have, nor did he want to live a life that was worse than death every day. He really didn’t want to live like this anymore…
Shen Xingyu didn’t expect him to speak this way, to say he was “disgusting.” Was this still his little wife?
“Shengsheng.”
Almost instantly, his face darkened completely. Then, he unnoticeably avoided the topic: “You just woke up; don’t talk too much. Get some rest. I’ll go to the kitchen and have them cook a bowl of porridge.”
Seeing that he wouldn’t mention the divorce, Liang Sheng grew anxious: “I don’t want to eat! I just want a divorce right now!”
Shen Xingyu ignored him and walked out quickly. He didn’t forget to lock the door behind him to prevent Liang Sheng from running away.
Once the man was out of sight, a single tear Shen Xingyu had been holding back suddenly fell from the corner of his eye, cold and biting.
Shen Xingyu was surprised. He raised a finger to wipe it away, staring at the moisture on his fingertip for a long time. Was this a tear?
He hadn’t cried for many years.
Ever since his mother died, his tears seemed to have dried up. For over ten years afterward, nothing could cause him such grief.
Am I afraid of losing Liang Sheng?
No, he wouldn’t let Liang Sheng leave!
Divorce? Don’t even think about it.
Shen Xingyu lowered his arm, his eyes filled with intense possessiveness. He would lock Liang Sheng up, keeping him by his side at all times.
Inside the room, facing the sudden silence, Liang Sheng’s forced stubbornness immediately collapsed.
He hugged his legs tightly, curling up in the corner of the bed, sobbing. His gasping breaths were heartbreaking.
Was I too harsh on Shen Xingyu just now?
He hadn’t wanted to be like that, but he was afraid that if he wasn’t firm, his heart would soften.
He didn’t have much time left.
For his remaining days, he wanted to live for himself. He wanted to go see the world outside. At least when he died, he wouldn’t have too many regrets and could take the scenery he had seen to reunite with his mother.
Thinking this, Liang Sheng felt even more pain. He cried until he was out of breath. Obviously, I’ll be free once I die. I should be happy. Why am I so sad…?
He could never get his husband’s love, even until death.
Now, he had come to terms with it. Some things you can never get no matter how hard you try. Perhaps they never belonged to you from the start. The beautiful memories of the past were just a dream—and now that the dream was over, nothing was left.
He was the one who fell too deep.
After crying for an unknown amount of time, Liang Sheng felt drowsy. The door was suddenly opened. He snapped awake and looked up in a panic, seeing the man walking in with a bowl of porridge, his expression gentle, his coldness gone.
“Shengsheng, come and eat. It’s your favorite fresh shrimp porridge. Your stomach isn’t good; you should eat it while it’s hot.”
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